


Ghost of the past

by Aisenic_Warrior



Category: Compilation of Final Fantasy VII
Genre: Aerith is basically Gaia's right hand, And zack roughly two, Angst with a Happy Ending, Cloud is roughly 4 years older, Cloud strife has self-esteem issues, Coming back from the dead, Genesis is melodramatic, How Do I Tag, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Suicidal Thoughts, It's less that Cloud adopted the wolf and more that the wolf adopted Cloud, Memory Loss, Multi, Not Beta Read, Not Dirge of Cerberus (Compilation of FFVII) Compliant, Post-Advent Children (Compilation of FFVII), Tags May Change, Warnings May Change, lots of headcanons, meaning they are roughly the same age, small language warning - I guess
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-10-07
Updated: 2020-12-31
Packaged: 2021-03-07 17:02:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 21,365
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26881135
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Aisenic_Warrior/pseuds/Aisenic_Warrior
Summary: Cloud never seemed to get a break.For the past year, old memories kept plaguing him, of people and past times that he just couldn’t seem to grasp.His cycle of misfortune just kept on spinning.The Livestream also hadn’t calmed down yet, still agitated.In conclusion: Everything was kinda weird at the moment-------------------At the same time as Cloud was sent to look for complications at the former nibelheimian reactor that may have led to the Livestreams difficulties, four long dead Individuals have awoken at the places of their death.
Relationships: Zack Fair/Angeal Hewley/Genesis Rhapsodos/Sephiroth/Cloud Strife
Comments: 35
Kudos: 207





	1. Hide in the unknown

**Author's Note:**

> Heya!  
> Until now, I've only read Fanfics, but now want to try my hand at one myself.  
> I've mostly taken the things I like to read and tried to copy that.  
> There will be some grammatical mistakes in here since English isn't my mother language and had no one else to proof read this...
> 
> Despite that, I hope you will enjoy this first chapter :)

Cloud’s Memory had always been a Problem… Or at least as far as he could remember.

His time in Nibelheim was already hard to discern, but thanks to Tifa he at least had a rough picture of what stories his memories tried to tell him… But his time in the Infantry remained almost completely obscure.

Muddled blurry figures, rough colors that only led one to think that they may be human. Bad Food, a lot of people, too much noise…

A sense of longing, comfort, hurt, and fear.

Rough concepts, where he couldn’t even be sure if they came from himself or if his mind just made them up when reconstructing itself in the place of Zack.

He wasn’t even really sure how he knew Zack.

Maybe they met on a Mission or ran into each other in the cafeteria.

He only knew that he was close to Zack for quite some time – At least a good… year and a half. 

But… Information beyond that remained messy at best.

Specific actions. Conversations. Entrusted secrets. Even the type of their relationship.

All of that continued being a mystery to him.

He couldn’t just ask someone after all, as far as he knew, everyone that once knew him – in Midgar at least – was dead.

Once, he considered asking one of the older Turks if they had any information about him…But… Yeah, not happening.

He may have gotten closer to Rufus and his entourage in the past few years, but not enough to ask something like that…

Tifa didn’t even know about any of his feelings towards the matter, and why should he bother her?

He had a good life at the moment. He possessed a room in Seventh heaven, the kids were healthy, and his Postal Service boomed, to the point that he even managed to help Tifa finance their living accommodations.

He had no reason to dwell on the past now, had he?

But ever since the situation surrounding Advent Day had calmed down, he just couldn’t seem to let it go.

Not only that, but he got these flashes sometimes, of people long gone or times past – short and rough – that was seemingly triggered by random things….

For example, while speaking to an old man about his Garden, he got this flash to someone who told him that “ Plants need to be trimmed after Winter, similar to how hair normally works…” someone ruffled his hair,” Just maybe not yours” he could almost imagine a snicker at that last part.

Cloud absolutely had no idea who that could have been back then, and he still didn’t know now…

He could only gather, from the feelings that erupted with the Memory? Flash? That this person had been caring and... maybe making fun of him? – The comment didn’t really seem malicious, more like a light jab or maybe an insider, but he couldn’t really be sure…

Another time, when he hung around with Yuffie and almost every other member of their old group (Vincent not being present due to refusing to actively use a phone), she started making fun of this old play? It’s apparently still rather popular and thus perfect parody material according to Yuffie.

She began to recite it in an old garb with a cheap white bread on her Face, gesturing wildly, and speaking in a poor attempt at an old narrator Voice: “Infinite is the mystery of the goddess-”

“Loveless, Act 1” Cloud cut her off, “We seek it thus and take to the sky”

Where… Where had that come from?

“Why, on this side of the planet, do you know this boring as fucking play, Cloud?” came as a response by Cid “I fell asleep during the play” Highwind.

“I have no idea.” He dismissed instantly, because… He really hadn’t.

When he thought about the play, he instantly connected it to the memory of auburn hair, playful laughter, a sense of Comfort in understood insecurity and betrayal.

As well as a weird connection to the smell of Apples, Leather, and something lightly burned.

Cloud hadn’t talked much for the rest of the evening and he had been fairly certain that Tifa’s worried gaze could eat a hole into his soul.

He has absolutely no idea why these thoughts, these Memories, came up now.

What on Gaia had someone to do, to be forever linked to an old play in the memory of an Infantry Soldier?

There were other flashes as well, mostly unrecognizable without the context he lacked, but there was one thing that concerned him…

Why did he see Sephiroth that often?

* * *

Something was wrong.

For one, he can breathe, blink, and feel the floor under him.

Then he also stood in the ruins of what he could only guess was the Nibelheim Mako reactor – overgrown with different kinds of fauna that gives the place the look as if it hadn’t been tended to for a few years –

He should also by all accounts be dead.

He had been falling into the reactor after he… had stabbed…. Cloud.

Fuck.

What had he been thinking?

Why, in any way, had he been thinking that burning down an entire Village was a good idea?

Why had he-

No matter, staying in the rundown reactor may not be a good idea at the moment. Getting out and finding information about his loved ones should be his top priority.

He really hoped that they were still alive – he really needed to apologize to the both of them…

The actions and things he did were inexcusable, but he had to at least try to fix something – drowning in self-pity wouldn’t redeem him of anything, much less drowning in despair due to being a monster (He still couldn’t forgive Angeal for that, didn’t they say that you had to go on, no matter what?).

Stepping out of the ruins of the former reactor, he let the sunlight warm his face. It was actually a nice temperature out, even without any kind of coat. Since Nibelheim, as one of the colder areas, rarely had this kind of temperature, Sephiroth quickly deduced that it was high summer.

That being said, this also has the consequence of being the hatching time of Nibeldragons. During these times, they defended and protected their territory more fiercely than usual. Under normal circumstances that wouldn’t really be a problem to him, but the only things on his person were the articles of clothing he wore at the point of his death and…nothing else...well… His chances to escape such an encounter without losing a leg, dropped rather low…

There also appears to be someone or something actually already involved in a fight against one.

Sephiroth tried to distance himself from the fight, since providing help couldn’t be considered an option at the moment and he didn’t really want to get pulled into the fight by the dragon’s mate, yet leaving the path would put him at a high risk of getting lost in the surrounding area and still running into such a beast.

So, he followed the path. Making sure to walk slowly and to not step on any objects that could attract attention to himself.

While traveling down the track, he noticed a motorbike lying at the side of the road. The bike seemed…not exactly new, but not like it was abandoned here at some point. It laid at the side of the road, like thrown or pushed away.

From the fact that there weren’t any signs of a bike having driven down from the reactor, but rather up, he deduced that whoever was now fighting the dragon was on their way up the mountain, only to be stopped by the attacking dragon and left their bike at the side to avoid an attack.

Sephiroth was fairly certain that, if Cloud were here, he would give the owner of the bike a disappointed and scolding look, tell him that ‘he is a shitty bike-owner’, and once out of earshot, begin to rant about “How dare they treat a bike of this quality like this? Do they have enough money to throw it around like a fucking lunatic?”

Or something like that… He didn’t really know how good the bike laying before him was.

It looked professional but not belonging to mass production. Sturdy, yet out of a rather light metal, a bike made for battle, and the only Motorbikes he knew that possessed those qualities were in the hands of ShinRa, and knowing enough about ShinRa to fill multiple lifetimes, he possessed the ability to say for certain that they love to plaster their logo on nearly every surface they owned ( he was surprised that they hadn’t yet suggested marking the SOLDIERS directly).

So yeah, more than likely no part of ShinRa.

In the time that he stood there – contemplating the topic of Bikes and ShinRa’ s logo – the sound of the fighting stopped.

Sephiroth broke out of his stupor when he heard someone mutter something along the lines of: “How can I forget that it’s hatching season, of course, it’s fucking hatching season.” And coming closer to his position

How would this person react to seeing a (former?) first class SOLDIER in the middle of nowhere, standing beside – what could only be assumed – to be their own bike?

The reaction may also depend on the fact if it was common knowledge that Sephiroth set fire to an entire village and maybe died? – He still wasn’t sure about that honestly, after all, no one could just come back from the dead…

In the end, it didn’t really matter, since the Person stepped out of the forest and onto the path.

The man wore a dark blue (maybe indigo?) sleeveless shirt, black pants, and boots, and his left arm and leg were covered in a black sleeve. For some reason, he wore only a shoulder pad on his left shoulder, which also adorned a wolf-emblem. He looked disheveled – more than likely due to the fight he just had – and had spiky blond hair. He was by now also pointing a sword – Buster like, but seemingly made out of multiple smaller swords, more than likely also a special unit similar to the bike – at him.

He sneered: “Why do you keep haunting me?” The man took a step forward, bringing the tip of the sword closer to the side of Sephiroth’s neck, “and what is your plan this time?”

In front of him stood Cloud Strife, the Person he stabbed, and one of his (former?) Boyfriends, with hateful and hunted eyes that he himself only knew from the Prisoners he took in Wutai, so unlike the determined, passionate little shit of an Infinitary soldier he had gotten to know.

He couldn’t move.

He couldn’t speak.

He felt absolutely rooted to the ground, bound and stiff.

Nowhere to run, no help near.

What was he supposed to say? – I’m sorry? – What do you mean? – What happened to you? – What plan? – or the short and simple – I’m sorry for stabbing you, hurting Zack and the Cowboy-girl and burning down Nibelheim, but I honestly have no idea what you are talking about? –

But all that actually came out of his mouth was a pathetic: “uh”

Really sophisticated Sephiroth. Genesis would be proud.

“Don’t ‘uh’ me.” Cloud took another small step forward, drawing the sword even closer to Sephiroth’s neck, drawing a few droplets of blood. “You show up now – when everything seems to be alright again – at a time where apparently the Livestream has been acting up again. You need to have a plan, and you either tell me, or I will kill you here and now.”

Cloud’s eyes had the Mako-glow. Cloud was enhanced, meaning he at some point got the enhancements to become a SOLDIER, and from the intensity, he could gather that Cloud was more than likely on the same – or maybe even above the – Mako-level of Genesis and Angeal were back then.

But all Sephiroth could do was lightly shake his head and say in a – hopefully – steady and slow tone: “I can promise you that I don’t have any plans, Cloud. I don’t even have a weapon on me.”

But instead of having the intended effect of showing that he meant no harm, it only seemed to confuse Cloud who slowly lowered his blade.

“Something is wrong”

“I figured that out as soon as I woke up, not being dead.”

“That makes it sound like you didn’t plan this.”

“How would I plan something like that?”

Conclusion: None of them really knew what was going on.

For a few minutes, they just stood there, staring at each other, trying to make something out of the differences in the Person they thought they knew.

Cloud had definitely grown up. Lost some of the boyish attributes that had only hinted at his future features. He had not grown that much – Sephiroth still towered over him by a few centimeters – but he had changed his hairstyle. Presenting a, somehow, even more, spiky look with longer hair. ‘Wolf’ was unquestionably been somewhat of a theme when he put together his outfit since, besides the emblem on his shoulder, he also wore a right earring with the same design.

Sooner or later one of them needed to speak up and it ended up being Sephiroth. He required the Information.

“How much time has passed since the Nibelheim incident?”

“Why should I answer?”

“Because I have no idea and staring at each other hasn’t helped either of us in the past few minutes.” Not in an obvious way at least.

That being said, it seemingly didn’t change whatsoever, since Cloud remained in a battle-ready stance and continued to search something in Sephiroth’s expression, something he didn’t seem to find. Sephiroth cleared his throat.

“I know that I am handsome Cloud, you told me that yourself multiple times. But I think that at the moment, both of us have better things to do then-“

“I never called you handsome.”

Sephiroth wasn’t quite sure what to make of that. From the way Cloud spoke, no hesitation, no doubt in his voice, an outsider would, no doubt, believe Cloud… but Sephiroth was by no means an outsider.

Sephiroth spend his whole life being treated and called an object by those ‘close’ to him. So when he met the others and their bond grew to the point of calling each other lovers, well… he made sure to remember as many Compliments as possible, to remember that there were people out there that were capable of loving him, of finding him attractive and worth spending time with, outside of him being a famous SOLDIER and commander.

So, to hear Cloud – the person so bad at getting, but completely earnest at giving Compliments – completely deny a part of all that… hurts.

He needed to make sure- Needed to make sure this is right.

He was insane to some point – he burned down Nibelheim for a Mother that in no sort of way was ever there for him after all – but he needed to make sure that he didn’t just imagine their time together, in an attempt to handle his overwhelming loneliness.

He needed something, someone that could assure him that he hasn’t gone past the point of no return. He-

“I’m sorry”

Sephiroth lifted his gaze that during his – still ongoing – emotional episode had dropped to the ground. His own eyes meet Cloud’s unsure, almost conflicted ones that broke contact shortly thereafter.

“I mean- I didn’t- I meant – uhm” Cloud seemed to be unable to finish his sentence. He appeared jittery, giving the impression of being more inclined to run away than continue, but held in place by his sense of duty.

“I… My memory isn’t the greatest. I, uhm” Cloud shook his head and lifted his hand to support it “Ever since the… Nibelheim incident, my past has been spotty at best. I can – somewhat – remember my time in Nibelheim, but all I know about my time in the Infinitary is… that it exists.”

His voice had been so unsure and stuttered constantly. It sounded nothing like the Person he talked to just a few minutes ago. He finally lifted his gaze to meet sephiroth’s.

“So… uhm, it could have happened, I just… don’t remember?”

He broke the eye contact again to mutter in a hushed voice “I am really not good at this, why do I even bother?”

Zack was a literal human-incarnation of a puppy; Genesis tended to quote LOVELESS at the worst of time and Cloud strife had self-esteem issues.

Some things never change.

This actually made Sephiroth snicker.

But, at the same time he…

Cloud didn’t remember his time in the Infantry. He didn’t remember his relationship with any of them. He… did he even know of their existence? Did he know of what an asshole-company ShinRa actually is?

Cloud was enhanced at some point, he was a SOLDIER now, he had to work with them – even if their branding was missing.

He didn’t remember Sephiroth, or at least, Sephiroth before he went insane.

What should he make of this?

It hurts. It hurts so much.

He just wanted to take him in his arms and tell him that he was doing alright.

But he couldn’t. Because Cloud didn’t remember and saw him as an enemy.

He was the enemy. He burnt down Nibelheim and stabbed him.

He didn’t deserve forgiveness; he didn’t deserve to be remembered as anything other than the insane monster he is.

But the others didn’t deserve this. The others should be remembered, and Cloud should be able to remember them.

He had to make this right; this was now his goal. That, and finding Zack, maybe both at the same time.

He wouldn’t – couldn’t – give up, won’t give up –

“It’s been nine years.” Cloud burst through his thought like a ray of sunlight on a rainy day.

“Excuse me?”

“Your Question. It’s been nine years since Nibelheim burned.”

Nine Years.

That was a long time – what all had happened in that time?

“Now, tell me, why can’t I feel her presence on you anymore?”

“Whose presence?”

If Cloud’s stance was anything to go by, then over the course of this conversation, Sephiroth’s threat level fell from ‘extremely high’ to ‘high-middle level’ to ‘Is this guy a complete Idiot?’

“JENOVA”

“My Mother?” What had she to do with anything? (Besides being his reason for burning Nibelheim, of course)

“No, JENOVA is not your mother” Cloud shook his head again, and shortly looked out into the forest, before laying his Eyes on Sephiroth again, “Look, can we just get a small change of scenery? I – don’t want to get attacked by another dragon again.”

* * *

Compared to the feeling of relief, pain, worry, and overall chaos that had flooded his brain in his last moments, now it was rather tame, nice even.

He may be sitting in the place where he died, but Angeal hadn’t felt that good in a long time.

He’s certain that he shouldn’t be alive right now since he can clearly remember Zack killing him.

Oh, Fuck-

Zack!

It just now came to him how much pressure he had put his boyfriend under –

How could he have thought that was an acceptable response? “Kill me and be my legacy, please. Also, take care of my **most treasured item** please, and thank you.”

Speaking of the Bustersword, what happened while he was gone?

How much time had even passed? And what were the others doing?

Angeal really, really hoped that Genesis had been able to find a cure and that they now lived happily in the middle of nowhere, hopefully, retired.

But he wasn’t stupid or naïve, he knew that Genesis wouldn’t be taken in by ShinRa again, and that – depending on how much time actually passed – they may be dead already… But after all the despair he faced in his recent memory, he just wanted to end this vicious circle.

The Information may be missing, but he could find out. After all, he was breathing, living, existing.

He stood up and took a look around. Modeoheim, similar to other towns in the icicle area, never

really warmed up. The best thing you could get was a state of “Not so much snow”, but as someone that didn’t spend that much time there yet, Angeal couldn’t really tell the difference.

But one thing he could be sure of is that he might as well be a popsicle in this weather. He couldn’t stand the cold; he grew up in a far too warm area for that. Cloud used to say that he might as well fit into his own plant collection with how little he managed to withstand the temperature. While he suffered from degradation, the cold hadn’t been able to touch him. His body might as well had been an oven, at that point of time, but now he just wanted to get away. To find an old house and start a fire in a fireplace.

His whole body trembled, but he still had to push on. He took one step, two steps, three, four, five… and so on. He had to think of something else, anything else. But he either drowned in self-pity or in the desire to not freeze to death.

What he wouldn’t give for his puppy’s unrelating amount of energy, Cloud’s natural resistance to the cold, Seph’s indifference to any temperature, or Gen’s large amount of fire Materia. Ifrit’s mighty mane, what he wouldn’t do for only one fire Materia, even a low level one.

But he was alive, and breathing, and getting his honor back.

Maybe not as a SOLDIER, he lost the right to call himself that but as a person.

If he even was a person now. Maybe the degradation would set in again. Maybe just by having these…. Cells in him, he was already monstrous by nature. But wouldn’t put that Gen and Sephiroth in the same boat? And what about Zack? Did he also inherit the cells as soon as he became a SOLDIER? Depending on how much time has passed, maybe Cloud was even a SOLDIER now…

So many questions, so few answers.

But he really needed to figure out at least a few of them… Because- Because if he remembered correctly then- If he remembered- no, not remembered, if his feeling was right then…

Then Zack had died at some point.

But that would mean that quite some time had passed, hadn’t it?

His Puppy could have died on a mission, but he…

Zack wasn’t that weak.

He properly died because of age, no, no, he- Zack had been young ~~(too young, like him)~~ so it must have-

It would mean that-

No, he shouldn’t think like that.

Everything would be fine.

Sephiroth stood still at the top of SOLDIERS.

Genesis found a cure and now lived happily.

Zack became a first class.

And Cloud finally managed to make it into SOLDIER.

Yes, they had to have their happy ending.

It was idealistic, he knew…

But he-

He-

He couldn’t live with the fact that he left them alone.

That he forced Zack, his prodigy, one of his boyfriends, to kill him.

That he placed that kind of burden on him.

That he was willing to die giving up.

Not fighting till the last second.

Or at least dying in any sort of honorable way.

No.

He had to make it right.

No matter how much time had passed.

* * *

Genesis felt like someone slapped him awake with the Bustersword.

Maybe not that bad but you get the point.

He had just been having a perfectly peaceful sleep.

He fell into the deep and endless Livestream after being defeated by Zack “Puppy” Fair.

Only to be healed of degradation and lulled to sleep by the goddess.

The Sleep had been refreshing, but he couldn’t quite be sure how much time actually passed.

His dreaded shoulder showed no sign of being damaged anymore, but the scars on his soul, remained – and a killer headache as well.

The years before his inevitable end remain a ~~(infinite)~~ mystery to him.

The time had passed in a blur back then.

At one point he had been begging Sephiroth for his DNA in hopes of still healing him.

Then, after finding out that Sephiroth died by the hands of none other than Cloud (or jumped into the Livestream himself? The reports varied), he had been furious.

The people he trusted, he loved, had betrayed him.

He spent the following years brooding, trying to slow down the degradation, and once he saw Zack, he just snapped.

All or nothing, he had been ready to end the life of his former Lover.

How foolish he was.

Of course, they hadn’t helped him.

He was a madman.

Grasping at strings of a life that long since was fated to perish.

He had hurt them – hurt them all.

Unloved, left behind.

No – not left behind.

He left them behind.

He left and hurt them to save himself.

And they all, Angeal, Sephiroth, Zack, and Cloud still had wanted to help him.

He had been too lost in his own damn world again to recognize to hurt and help from others.

He even dragged Geal down himself!

He hadn’t even asked after the state Cloud was in.

He pressured Sephiroth to give him his DNA after just telling him that his whole life had been a Lie.

He – He wanted to use Sephiroth’s weakness to save himself!

And to top it all off, he made Zack kill another one of their group as if he didn’t carry enough guilt already?

Angeal called himself a Monster, but if he was already a monster, then what had been Genesis?

A demon?

No.

He was simply a beast.

No logical thought, no connections to other beings.

It just lives for its own survival, no one else’s, and using all means necessary to achieve that goal.

Purely driven by instinct.

He was a beast, nothing more, nothing less.

But he hadn’t been beyond salvation.

The merciful goddess saved him, deemed him worthy of a second chance, as one of the protectors of this planet.

To wake in her time of need.

Now he awoke from his dreamless slumber, but why?

The was no meteor crashing into the planet, or a dragon rampaging a giant city.

Just him and his own unending guilt.

No instructions, just him, sitting on a Hill near the crater of the former Banora.

He was completely clueless.

He wanted his family, his lovers back.

To sit another night Infront of Geal’s television, watching another weird movie that Zack had deemed worthy to show Seph and Cloud,

Cuddled together on the couch and with an unhealthy amount of snacks.

But that could never be possible again.

If his rather old PHS is anything to go by, then roughly four years had passed since his sleep had started.

How was Zack doing? Had Cloud recovered from whatever he suffered from?

Are they even still alive or had ShinRa gotten to them?

He needed to know, and there existed only one place that held the answers.

ShinRa HQ in Midgar.

With a set goal and destination, he started his new long-winded journey.

At times like these, he missed his wing.  
  


* * *

He sat at the precipice before Midgar, or at least, what was once Midgar.

The once-bustling City, the titan of technical evolution, laid reduced to ruins.

Before him, in the ground, stood the Bustersword.

If he had to guess, it meant to be a sort of memorial.

He didn’t understand- couldn’t understand.

Why had Cloud – or whoever left the blade here – decided to put it here?

Unprotected from wind and weather, wear and tear, the sands of time?

He knew he had died – been taken away by Angeal, and in doing so left Cloud behind.

He knew that Aerith died – and now seemingly assisted Gaia.

She told him that the planet deemed it necessary to bring him back.

“Just do what you want to do.” She told him directly.

What he wanted to do, huh?

Well, for starters, he needed to find Cloud.

Time had passed. Cloud – or someone else… but it had been Cloud, right? – decided he didn’t need the Buster – Angeal’s trusted and sacred weapon – any more and Midgar was desecrated by a giant rock.

Zack not knowing how Cloud – his only constant these past few years – was doing, really started to freak him out.

Was he even alive? Or just bedridden in some hospital?

He thought that he maybe spoke to Cloud in the Livestream, but his memories, the emotions, were too blurry, too unsure.

Had Cloud even responded? Or had the excessive Mako led him closer to death than Zack feared?

Maybe ShinRa found him and decided to just throw him back under Hojo’s ‘care’.

The thought made him sick.

How could he have ever trusted them?

How blind, how naïve was he to think ShinRa wouldn’t stoop to that level, even after finding out about Sephiroth’s past?

Taking the Buster, he started walking towards the ruins of the former ShinRa Metropole.

“You are a former SOLDIER, right?” sounded a voice from a bit further away.

A black hair woman, who even wore mostly black, walked towards him.

To be precise, she sported a black vest and shorts, which adjourned a rather long cape.

Her boots were also mostly black, but with white accents, as well as a white tank top under her vest… Her hair reached mid-back and the only really colorful outliers were her brown gloves and the pink ribbon wrapped around her upper arm.

The ribbon seemed familiar, like the Women herself.

Not sure when and where he met her, but he knew her.

What was she doing out here?

She has apparently driven out here in a Vehicle from the… WRO? Or, that what at least what the logo said.

The chance was rather small then, that it was a part of ShinRa, they loved to plaster their logo everywhere. The car was built sturdy, or at least Zack would describe it as such, clearly made for this terrain.

She had left the automobile and now was walking towards him.

Had the Buster become some sort of untouchable icon?

Or was maybe put a bounty on whoever touched the sword by ShinRa and the WRO was some hunter-organization?

By now she stood right in front of him, yeah, he defiantly knew her… but from where?

“You’re Zack Fair, right?” Whoopsie daisy, she knew him even by name then. Play it off.

“Naw, not sure who that is, but I’ve been compared to him before, sounds like a handsome lad!”

He put on a laugh afterward, those always work.

“Uh-huh. Then may I ask what you are doing with the Bustersword?”

Such sarcastic, much irony.

“Well – you see – there were a lot of monsters, and my old sword broke, was a cheap old thing you know, and I ran away from one a – flock of Fly Eye and I desperately needed another weapon. Soooo, I thought, why not the old weapon that was there!”

The Women looked unimpressed, “Yes, and any ordinary person would be able to lift ‘the old weapon’.”

“Not any ordinary person, no, I never denied being a former SOLDIER – Wait, former?”

was there a thing such as former SOLDIERS? Or did she just use another Word for a deserter?

“So…” She took another step forward, being almost too close to comfort… But still smaller than Cloud, heh, “You don’t deny being a SOLDIER, have no idea that SOLDIER hasn’t really been a ‘thing’ for three years or so, and carry the Bustersword with you…. Sounds an awful lot like a former dead Zack Fair, doesn’t it?”

She was good.

Way too good.

ABORT MISSON!

…

He took off running.

She ran after him.

She was fast.

He was faster.

His movement started feeling sluggish-

Fuck.

“You know, Mister Fair” Coming up beside him jogging, she held up a Materia, “Next time, don’t run away from a foe who can cast Stop.”

Zack stopped (pun very much intended). No use making himself look like more of an idiot.

“What now, miss…” Name please, it’d be nice to know who on Gaia you are Miss….

“Just call me Tifa, I’m not that old yet”

“Wait, Tifa… As in Tifa Lockhart?

“Don’t know that many other Tifas honestly.”

Laughter ran through the outskirts of what was once Midgar.

No way!

The person before him was THE Tifa, Cloud’s childhood friend.

No wonder she knew him, they met before.

And by that fact, it couldn’t have passed that much time…

Well, maybe a few years at most, that was really comforting.

He could have hugged her… But didn’t

It’d be weird…

Well now, after finally managing to contain his laughter, he looked at Tifa head-on, and asked: “I know this may now come out of left field, but do you know anything about Cloud’s condition or where he might be at the moment?”

Tifa wore an expression of suppressed laughter and some kind of annoyance, “I’d be a bad coworker and best friend if I didn’t even know how he was doing.”

Coworker? Was Could also working for whatever the WRO was?

And what had she even meant before, when she said that SOLDIER didn’t exist anymore?

“You have a very expressive face; I can literally see all the questions popping up in your head.”

Came a snickering Comment.

Wow, rude.

“Come on now, I originally just wanted to bring you to Edge to explain things better, not to chase you through the Outskirts.”

Zack was tired from a whole day of walking and starving.

Fuck heightened metabolism and not being reborn with a full stomach.

So now he tracked with Tifa to the Car…

Neat…

* * *

_Being in the Infinitary was weird, Cloud concluded._

_He has been here for…. way too long, without getting anywhere._

_Weak, weak, way too weak to get anywhere._

_The others in his squad now were nice enough._

_They weren’t the worst; they weren’t the best._

_But they had been the closest thing he had to friends in there for as long as time._

_That was, at least, until he met Zack._

_Now, don’t get him wrong, Cloud himself was still weak, and useless and more often than not, in someone’s way, but Zack never seemed to mind that._

_And that made his problems even more obvious._

_Zack was open, happy, encouraging, and an overall great and likable person, and Cloud was…_

_Cloud was the kid no one liked, the kid who thought he was better than everyone else and destined for great things. He was the kid who utterly failed at getting into SOLDIER and only ever thought of himself._

_Cloud didn’t have any good aspects, his instructors always told him that he was in over his head, that he’d never meet the physical conditions for becoming a SOLDIER._

_He once – in what some of the other Cadets called a temper tantrum – ran to a rooftop._

_He hadn’t thought of jumping, not really, but to outsiders, it must have looked like it, and while no one in Midgar would notice him standing there, someone else was on the dark roof, clouded in shadows, not visible with an unenhanced eye. The roof was also filled with a weird smell of… Apples and leather…_

_“Jumping from here won’t end your life you know?”_

_Cloud hadn’t been frightened, no, not him, “I hadn’t planned to jump”_

_“And I hadn’t insinuated that you would”_

_The asshole defiantly did, no question about that._

_He scoffed, “Then what are you doing up here? Enjoying the view?”_

_“My friend, do you fly away now?_

_To a world that abhors you and I”_

_This asshole- Did he really just quote LOVELESS at him?_

_Two can play at that game asshat._

_Cloud decided to interrupt the stranger and continued_

_“All that awaits you is a somber morrow_

_No matter where the winds may blow”_

_The man gave a burst of delighted laughter, “Another fan of LOVELESS; a man of culture then! A rare sight nowadays.”_

_“Did you really just use ‘a man of culture’ unironically?”_

_“Why yes, is it not appropriate anymore?”_

_“Less appropriate and more made a joke out of”_

_“I will never understand modern Culture”_

_“No one understands modern Culture”_

_The man just hymned and started humming a small song._

_Cloud didn’t recognize the melody at first, but then-_

_“That’s from the old LOVELESS-TV adaptation, right?”_

_“Yes! Exactly! No one else seems to know it! But please never end a sentence with ‘right’ near me again. In recent times it started spreading like the plague across our language and is corrupting it from the inside out! I could just rip out the vocal cords of whoever-“ The man just started ranting now._

_Cloud is honestly… bamboozled._

_Yes._

_“Hey, mister of the unknown-“_

_“A poetic name, I like it, continue."_

_“Wasn’t meant to be poetic,” he bit back, he really couldn’t stand this person, “What I meant to ask was, do you normally quote LOVELESS at random people?”_

_“Most people are too uneducated to understand the beauty of the play, and thus, I have to teach it to them.”_

_“It makes you sound really obnoxious.”_

_“I’ve been told.”_

_“Seems like their opinions don’t matter then.”_

_“Oh no, some of them definitely do, they just don’t know anything about poetry or art. You are, in fact, the first person in this whole damned Company that recognized the play, much less the song, without looking it up.”_

_“It’s hard not to recognize one of the only things you had to read and watch growing up.”_

_“Must have been a sad childhood then.”_

_“I mean, the lack of reading material kind of sucked, but that wasn’t really the worst part.”_

_They sat in a somewhat comfortable silence, afterward. Neither wanting to continue the conversation from that point on._

_The man just kept sitting there, enveloped by darkness and hummed the song._

_It was… peaceful._

_Cloud started singing the lyrics to the melody_

_Cloud had to leave before Mister Unknown, to make it back in time to the barracks._

_He didn’t find out for a few weeks with whom he actually talked, but they started to converse on that rooftop nearly every evening._

_It was always obvious when the man was around, he spread the smell of apples and leather all over the roof when he was present._


	2. Keep haunting us

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Angeal was cold, Sephiroth tried to do small talk, Zack tried to be Zack, Cloud was weirded out by Sephiroth and Genesis has met an Edgelord.  
> Also, past Cloud is panicking.
> 
> What could possibly go wrong?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Again, this ended up being longer than expected and wanted....  
> And took longer than wanted...  
> But here is Chapter two and I still can't write dialouges.  
> Again, there are going to be grammatical errors, and i will try to find some myself over the next few days.  
> So, I hope you will enjoy this chapter :)

Angeal had a problem.

Not a small one – that you could easily take care of, but are too lazy to be bothered by it.

Not a moderate one – that you need to actually pay attention to but aren’t exactly fatal.

A severe one – the type that are mostly out of your control, but often ended fatal.

He had no idea where he was going, was shivering like a leaf in a hurricane and hungry enough to be willing to eat anything.

So yeah, severe problem.

The Frostbite and Hypothermia already started to set in some time ago.

Being a SOLDIER had many advantages, like being able to survive longer in situations similar to these, but they weren’t invincible.

But hey, thanks to the mako constantly warming his eyes, he didn’t have to worry about snow blindness as well.

The Cold, excuse his wordchoice, sucks.

Let’s jump back to the problem of possessing no idea on where he was actually going…

Where was- Where was he even heading to begin with?

The nearest town had been Icicle Inn, right?

But… was he even heading to it?

Where was it again?

Where was he again?

He…

What was going on?

Everything felt cold. He didn’t even shiver anymore, he just froze.

He couldn’t really think anymore, couldn’t even concentrate on the things that pushed him forward the whole time…

He couldn’t feel much of anything anymore actually, just the cold.

All-encompassing.

Ever present.

He fell over, couldn’t really walk anymore.

He was the perfect prey for anything coming across him.

And something came.

Too bad he lost the ability to process what that might have been.

Angeal awoke groggy.

He laid in something soft, a bed more than likely.

Had he been asleep?

Why is he still tired?

No matter.

He wanted to sleep, for just a few more minutes.

The next time he awoke, he noticed more than the fact he was awake and in a Bed.

There is also an IV hooked up to his arm.

He noticed he was warm-

Not cold anymore.

It felt nice.

But where was he?

It seemed to be some kind of hospital room with two beds, even though one is unoccupied at the moment.

The room had not been colored in the usual white tones that one would expect.

The walls wore a blue and mint like hue and despite these rather cool colors, the lighting gave the chamber a warm and somehow nostalgic atmosphere – he was glad to have landed in a seemingly older room that used the older lightbulbs, despite being more pricy for the hospital, it made the room almost-

It made the room feel warm and cozy.

Beside him stood a Nightstand with a bottle of water and a drinking glass.

He rolled the IV out of the way to stand up and made his way on shaky legs to the window besides his bed. Outside he saw what appears to be a part of Icicle Inn.

How had he made it here?

What even happened at the end?

Had he been found or managed to drag himself here?

“Oh, I see you are already awake…” A voice behind him said, “eh, and already standing, please sit down.”

He just realized, wasn’t he wanted at the time of his death?

Was ShinRa still after him?

Did they even recognize him?

“Sir, can you hear me?”

Angeal turned around to see a doctor standing there, with a clipboard in hand.

He nodded to answer her question. Cooperation could only benefit him at the moment

The doctor gave him a small smile, “Good to see you awake, sir.”

She sat down on the bed opposite of him.

“Now let’s start with the more serious things first, shall we?”

He nodded again.

“Alright. First off, you are a former SOLDIER, right? Pretty high ranking as well?"

So, she knew, which was to be expected honestly. His eyes didn’t really hide it.

But what had she meant by 'former'?

He could only nod again.

“Alright, now… Do you need anything? We put water here, but do you have hunger or maybe need to use the toilet? People often forget these things in, well, these situations.”

“I am somewhat hungry Ma’am, but I’d rather find out what exactly happened.”

“So, you can talk.” She gave a light laugh and crooked her head a bit to the side “Well, then… I’ll call someone to bring you something to eat while we talk about everything, alright?”

He once again, nodded.

Food may be only secondary on his list of concerns, but he would need the energy.

“Now, let’s take care of some of your questions, alright?”

“Thank you”, he gave her a smile now, if she worked for ShinRa, she was being rather civil about him being here “can you tell me how I got here? I can’t really remember…”

“That’s only natural” She waved off “You weren’t even awake. You got carried here by Mister Smith, who found you passed out in the, quote unquote, middle of nowhere. You suffered from an advanced stage of hypothermia, but thanks to fast treatment and your enhancements, came away rather scot-free.” She shuffled through a few notes on her clipboard, “You also had a few places that suffered frostbite, mostly the hands and toes, but those regenerated even faster.”

That sounded normal, at least for someone enhanced.

The Doctor looked straight at him and appeared to evaluate him: “You know, at first it seemed surreal, someone coming back from the confirmed dead… But here you are, in the flesh.”

“So, you know who I am.”, that was too bad, he would have been safer if she hadn’t.

“I looked into it – never really kept up with all the Midgar drama – but one of the older nurses who was always too involved in the rumor mill, hinted at who she thought you may be.”

“Then say it to me outright, stop dancing around it, who am I?”

The woman smirked: “No need to get so authoritarian, I’ll cut to the chase, you are Angeal Hewley, the first-class SOLDIER-deserter that died in Modeoheim, roughly ten years ago, am I right?”

Ten years.

It’s been ten years since he died.

It’s been ten years since he placed such a huge burden on Zack.

It’s been ten years since any of his boyfriends saw him alive, even longer when you count the time, he spent degrading.

What all happened in that time?

Had Zack truly died?

If yes, when?

How old must they all be right-

“If I had to guess, then you woke up in Modeoheim, not suited for the weather and unable to find anything more suitable – since that place was raided quite some time ago – and decided to take your chances to make it up here. You also have no idea what happened since you died, right?”

This doctor was good, maybe she once worked for some kind of detective agency with that kind of deduction ability.

All he could do was nod once again and mumble a quiet “Please.”

Yet, before the person across from him could respond, a knock could be heard coming from the door.

“Your food. Let’s make a deal, you eat your meal, and I come back in an hour with a bunch of articles about the last ten years, I don’t have time to go through them all with you, so that’s the best I can do, alright?”

“Deal.”

She snickered, “An Andeal?”

….

“No.”

* * *

“Are you going to hand me over to ShinRa?”

“Excuse me?”

“You are a SOLDIER now and as far as I know, I laid waste to an entire town and damaged one of their reactors… Others have been killed for far less.”

Once again, Cloud looked at him like he just suggested the weirdest thing of his life, which by his standard shouldn’t be that weird, but that didn’t help to calm any of Sephiroth’s nerves.

He really didn’t want to mess this up.

Alas, it appeared as if Cloud came to a realization. “Are you…. Assuming I work for ShinRa?”

What else was he supposed-

Of course, he was.

There are few explanations as to how someone could get their hands on the treatment and some were worse than others.

But overall, the only ones able to make SOLDIERS with a… somewhat safe quota, was ShinRa.

Still, it appeared as if he was wrong, since -going from Cloud’s reaction – ShinRa wouldn’t change its name and Cloud seemed rather…. Offended at the thought of working for them.

Then, he heard a soft mumble of: “It’d be hard to work for a company that didn’t exist anymore.”

“Didn’t exist anymore? But that would mean that ShinRa fell at some point and Cloud could have still once worked for them-

But no, then why did he look so-“  
  


“You are… thinking out loud.”

He was… oh.

“Excuse me, I’ve been told I do that often...” Sephiroth trailed off…

He never did that often, only around people he trusted – not that Cloud remembered that.

Cloud had been pushing his bike (“Fenrir”, Cloud told him after he asked about it…. Of course, he called it after a Wolf) for a while

They both would have fit onto it…. But Cloud didn’t trust him enough for that.

A few hours had passed.

The sun began to set and in the meantime, they hadn’t talked that much, even though Sephiroth burned with Questions.

He did try to initiate small talk a few times, but Cloud only answered with either grunts, or one-word replies, and none of his lessons with Zack really prepared him for that. (“We’ll focus on trying small talk with people a bit more… social… than you are at the moment and go from there. Alrighty?”)

So, keeping up a Conversation ended up not working.

But he did learn a few things.

For instance, he made his sword and bike himself.

Apparently, the sword didn’t have an actual name and Cloud himself just called it ‘Fusion Sword’, but people somehow thought it was called First Tsurugi and he had given up at understanding why.

Sephiroth decided to call it Fusion Sword to please Cloud, but if asked, he will tell others that it is First Tsurugi, since he thrives on harmless Chaos.

Back to the topic at hand.

They had been walking for a while now and he had to admit that he started to get hungry some time ago.

Was he supposed to say something?

He had never been in a situation where he had to ask someone for food.

Growing up, Hojo and the other scientists controlled his food intake.

In Wutai, he had control over the rations and knew when he got to eat what.

And in the meantime, he had gotten on a regular schedule thanks to Angeal and later on Zack.

What was he supposed to say?

“I’m hungry.”

No, that wouldn’t work, why would it-

“Oh, I forgot about that…” Cloud muttered

…

He spoke out loud again, right?

This will become a problem at some point, won’t it?

Shiva damn it.

Wait…

Had Cloud said he forgot about… Eating?

“Cloud, when was the last time you ate something?”

Said man now looked at Sephiroth confused for a moment, either because he asked that, or because he had to think about the answer… maybe even both…

“Last time I ate? I think that would before I started the journey here….”

“That… was how long ag-“

“Where did you wake up?”

Was he trying to change the topic… or did he just remember something?

His expression didn’t give that much away… especially to Sephiroth…

“In the Reactor, why?”

“Did you see anything strange in there?”

“Other than me being alive? Not as far as I know?”

“Okay…”

…

That was something…

After a bit more walking, they reached a sort of small cave in the side of the hills around them and after scaring away a few Grenade-monsters in it, they settled in for the night…

Cloud started a small fire with a few sticks he picked up on the walk here, and a fire materia…

“Now, we have a bit of time…” Cloud started, rubbing his neck…” I mentioned the topic sorrounding your mother some time ago, didn't I? Maybe I should elaborate on that..."

He had some questions about that, yes, so… “That be nice”

Cloud, once again, looked at him as I’ve he couldn’t comprehend whatever Sephiroth was saying…

Did he sound so far off? Or did Cloud just have weird expectations nowadays?

Again, maybe both.

“Alright…It’d be better if Vincent explained this, he knows more about it, but contacting the guy is a pain in and of itself…

So, your birthmother wasn’t JENOVA, it was a scientist called Lucrecia Crescent…

She got injected with the cells of JENOVA – that acts a lot like a parasite or virus – while she was pregnant and they – She and Hojo basically – decided to… use you as a test subject…

At the end… I think, she regretted that decision and after having you taken away… and fled to some kind of crystal cave…”

That was a lot to digest…

So, the person who he was told was his mother his whole life wasn’t… but actually some Scientist who decided it was a moral decision to infect herself and her child with some… parasite? Who he had been told was his mother? Who was apparently an Ancient?

How… did that add up?

It didn’t… but why would Cloud lie to him?

And most importantly, he wasn’t lying.

Cloud was horrible at it or at least he was…

But he… didn’t really know Cloud anymore, did he?

A lot changed in a year back then, what could all happen in nine years?

But he wanted to trust him

And he had to say something…

“How… No, what is JENOVA then? An ancient parasite?”

Cloud contemplated for a moment before answering: “Yes and no… She is a parasite or virus… and technically ancient… but not an Ancient…”

“She wasn’t?”

“I don’t even know if JENOVA was female?”

“I can remember seeing a female body in the Nibelheim reactor… nine years ago…”

“She… I think… The Cetra… uhm, that were the Ancients… called her the ‘Calamity from the skies’, since she- it- I don't know- came from the meteor that made the northern Crater and… I think she led to the demise of most of them…and in the end they sealed her in the northern Crater…. which froze over… But before that she took over one of the bodies of a Cetra…that’s the body you saw... “

So… he possessed… what is basically Alien DNA?

He...

Sephiroth didn’t know what to make of that….

He had been used to… what?

Why did he exist?

Why… Why had he burned down a town for an Alien, who claimed to be his mother?

Why did he believe her?

Did his actions or his origins make him the monster he is? Or a mixture of both?

Why did Cloud know this?

Why did he believe Cloud, despite it being this outrageous?

Oh right…

He loved Cloud…

Not his mother.

Not his father.

Not whatever JENOVA ( ~~Not anymore~~ )was.

He loved Cloud and Zack, and once upon a time, Genesis and Angeal.

The people who believed him to be human, who trusted him, who cared for him and who-

Genesis said they degraded due to some kind of cells? Did he say they were JENOVA’s Cells?

He couldn’t remember…

But he was fairly certain he did.

JENOVA was the reason why Genesis and Angeal degraded.

JENOVA was the reason why they left him, left them.

JENOVA was the reason they were dead.

JENOVA, no, not just her, Hojo, Hollander, his mother and all of ShinRa overall was at fault for his existence, for all his pain, for the suffering of his loved ones

They also had to be the reason that Cloud didn’t truly remember him, right?

“You said that you were hungry, so, here.”

A bowl of soup was shoved in front of him.

“Thank you…”

* * *

Normally, Zack was a really social person.

If given the opportunity, he could talk about all sorts of things for hours on end.

He knew how to start conversations with the most hard to talk to people and he can even keep up a one-sided conversation.

He was good at talking, maybe not as well-versed as Genesis was, or as respectful as Angeal, but he was good at it.

Open, friendly and sometimes even happy-go-lucky, people had described him.

Go to him if you need help from any SOLDIERS.

These are some of the things he was proud of, being trusted and looked up to.

But sometimes, he despised it.

Sometimes he wasn’t in a great mood, everyone had those days.

He wasn’t ashamed of that, but some people never seemed to understand that.

Everyone mourned differently.

Cloud tended to seek those close to him out and talked to them.

Different things, often not even important things.

He never avoided the loss, no, he talked about it often, at least with his remaining boyfriends.

Zack’s Spikey wanted to share his memories, he treasured them.

Sephiroth was not as open – of course not, he was Sephiroth – but it was obvious.

Sometimes he just called either Zack or Cloud or both out of work, to drag them into his apartment to cuddle on the couch.

Just being alone with them, in a silent understanding.

They weren’t alone, Sephy needed the reassurance.

Zack… never knew how to deal with it.

Angeal asked him to carry his legacy, he sat in a different boat to the others.

He killed him himself.

He had murdered Angeal.

He… how was he supposed to deal with that?

He never lost someone that was that close to him – he lost friends and comrades – but never someone as close as Angeal.

And Genesis had been still mad and missing - thought dead, but he already doubted that back then...

He never comprehended on how he was supposed to formulate his feelings to anyone else on that matter.

He was… completely new at this.

He enjoyed the talks with cloud, and the cuddles with Seph, but-

He couldn’t engage them himself-

He never knew why.

He just couldn’t.

But almost everyone expected him to keep going like nothing happened.

They still wanted something from him.

Help, food, advice.

He liked helping and couldn’t disappoint them.

So, he ignored his problems… Hoping they would go away.

They never did.

Even now, in the car with Tifa.

It still hurt.

Even more so.

And on top of that, he was still hungry…

They tried to talk; they really did…but…

It always fell flat.

Neither really wanted to touch any wound subjects, Tifa tried multiple times, but…

It did just not work out.

So, they kept the conversations completely inane, till they had absolutely nothing casual to talk about anymore.

It was extremely boring.

They drove for what felt like hours.

Finally, he got some worthwhile information:

“WRO stands for the World Regenesis organization.”

“The excuse-me-what-now?”

“Exactly. They are a, sort of, volunteer organization to help restore and heal the planet, but basically just replace ShinRa in a military and governmental sense.”

“So…ShinRa minus… Midgar and Mako energy?”

“And no current SOLDIERS, only former ones that needed work.”

“…What actually happened to ShinRa?”

“Fell apart after Meteorfall – The event that caused… many things…” She made a short pause, “ Look, that is a lot of stuff, and I am not that good at explaining all of that without forgetting something, so…”

She seemed uncomfortable, like she didn’t want to elaborate.

So, he just took over.

“Okay, understood Ma’am!" He did a little salute "But, uhm… could you at least tell me how Cloud is doing?”

He finally got that out, that…was honestly his most important question.

“Cloud? Cloud is doing…. Alright? As far as I know, he is physically alright, he just seemed a bit downtrodden in the last few months…”

Well, not sure if that is more information then he was expecting or less….

He honestly kind of expected for her to brush him off…

But no, just ‘Cloud is alright just being Cloud’.

…

Cloud was doing physically alright, eh?

That meant that he is walking around and… well, actually alive right?

He survived the Mako poisoning and was doing alright.

At least physically.

Zack couldn’t be sure what Cloud had been doing the past few years, and in what way he was ‘downtrodden’ (was it a "I am nothing"- downtrodden, a "All my loved ones are dead"- downtrodden or a simple "someone ate my sandwhich" - downtrodden?)

But, he hoped he could maybe help with that at least, if Cloud even wanted anything to do with him…

Maybe he moved on as he should but didn’t want Zack to drag him back down.

A short while thereafter, they arrived in a city – more than likely this ‘Edge’ – it looked a bit like Midgar, industrial and metallic.

But not like either the slums or above the plate, it appeared like a mix of both to Zack.

The name Edge also made sense, since it was built at the… well,… edge of the ruined Midgar

They never fully entered the city though, taking route to a larger building at the outskirts of the town.

“This a newly build public hospital, they’ll want to check you up, due to coming back from the dead.” Tifa clarified.

“As long as I get answers and food and not being stuck in mako tanks, I’m fine with a ‘checkup’.”

“Being stuck in mako tanks – Hojo?”

“Yeah, that asshole.”

She hummed in reply.

They left the car at the entrance of this hospital and passed the threshold of the building.

In the lobby stood a man he only saw a handful of times at best, with black hair – a few gray strands should be noted – and beard.

The (‘Former’ Zack can only guess) Head of Urban development, Reeve Tuesti stood before him in Suit and with a smile.

He laid eyes on Zack and greeted: “Glad to actually, or rather officially meet the face behind the name, Welcome back to the land of the living Zack Fair.”

…

Zack was still hungry, but from what he could guess, he wouldn’t get something to eat for another hour.

* * *

Sephiroth was sleeping.

Sephiroth was sleeping on the ground in front of Cloud.

Peaceful and at ease, like he knew that no one will harm him here….

He really wasn’t sure what he was meant to make of that.

He overall, wasn’t sure what to make of this… Sephiroth.

He seemed nothing like the mass murdering, mother obsessed, brutal force of nature and bringer of meteor, but rather more like… He didn’t know.

And that was a problem, since this Sephiroth knew him and trusted him for no reason.

And why did he give Cloud such an impression of familiarity?

Why does he want to console the white haired SOLDIER whenever he got that heartbroken look on his face?

How could Sephiroth even look heartbroken?

It was Sephiroth for Gaia’s sake!

What was he supposed to do?

He couldn’t just kill him, this… Sephiroth didn’t even seem to remember anything past Nibelheim, what already was bad, but not like Meteor bad - he still had to remember his own mothers name - he missed her.

What was he even supposed to tell the others?

‘Hey guys, I’ve found Sephiroth but didn’t kill him because he looked at me like a lost little lamb whose whole world just broke apart.’

That sounded so pathetic.

It was pathetic.

And Sephiroth was still sleeping in front of him like nothing is wrong.

So much is wrong.

With himself, with Sephiroth and the whole planet.

Why was he chasing the past so much, and why did it feel like he once knew this Sephiroth?

What was he missing?

He never became a SOLDIER, and no ordinary person would just meet Sephiroth enough times to call him directly handsome.

What was past Cloud thinking?

Was that why Sephiroth always had it out for Cloud?

Not because he was the treat level of a SOLDIER and carried JENOVA’s cells, but because Cloud called him handsome? To his face?

Seriously, Cloud just wanted Gaia to open up and absorb him in the Lifestream.

Or bury his face in a pillow and scream, both would work actually.

He needed to call Reeve.

He was the one to ask Cloud to check the reactor.

The reactor where Sephiroth was reborn-

No, bad train of thought, go back to calling Reeve.

“Reeve speaking, what have you found out Cloud?” Straight to the point Cloud, no more distracting.

“Sephiroth is alive and sleeping.”

“Cutting right to the chase then and, sleeping in what way? Materia or-“

“Regular, he just, slept after eating some soup.”

“You gave him soup?”

“He was hungry.”

“Alright”

“Reeve?”

“Yes Cloud?”

“Did you know that Sephiroth knew me longer than just the Nibelheim mission?”

…

Had he not said that he shouldn’t stray with his train of thought? What would Reeve even know about that? “You know what, Reeve, Forget it and ju-“

“Yes, I knew that you knew Sephiroth for at least two and a half years before the Nibelheim mission, more than likely even longer.”

He…what?

He knew Sephiroth for how long?

“How?”

“Excuse me?”

“How could I know Sephiroth for that long?”

“Have you considered the only other first Class SOLDIER you know?”

“Zack? Is that a theory or fact?”

“Cloud, I am not part of the Turks, I don’t know every facet of your life, so… Theory.

It made sense, but the only one he could ask was Sephiroth himself…

And that would be weird…

“Cloud, are you still there?”

“Yes.”

“Where should we pick you up?”

“Can’t you just check the coordinates of the extra phone you gave me?”

“That isn’t the point of that phone but considering the circumstances... Yes, I’ll send a Helicopter there.”

Fuck Helicopters…” Alright”

“Goodbye Cloud, and take care”

“Goodbye.”

Reeve hung up.

…

He was stuck with a weird Sephiroth for the night, a weird Sephiroth who slept like a kitten you just wanted to hug.

He knew Sephiroth for quite some time then…

What kind of relationship had he had with the topmost SOLDIER?

It didn’t make sense.

And how did Zack and the people from his flashes play into all of that?

This…

He could only ask Sephiroth, couldn’t he?

This, is so weird.

On so many levels.

But, apparently, that has always been the case.

Cloud threw his hands up in hope of burning some energy.

He couldn’t leave the cave. Sephiroth could wake up and take the opportunity to leave.

The cave itself was somewhat small and the best Cloud could do in it was pace up and down.

Again, and again - it suddenly felt so small.

He wanted to fight something, to get his mind off this situation, this problem.

But he couldn’t.

That…

He wanted to scream.

But again, sleeping Sephiroth.

He didn’t know how long he contemplated the problem.

He went up and down.

Hummed a quiet tune.

It felt like hours had past, but when he looked at his PHS it showed that not even an hour went by since his call with Reeve.

During the night, he heard a few nibelwolves howl in the distance and a few other monsters scurrying around. The sky was clear, and nothing would lead one to be prepared for what happened next.

In one moment to the next, a lightning strike hit the forest outside. And the sky was full of stromclouds.

Another sudden weather-change.

Those started to happen some time ago.

The monsters clearly weren’t prepared, since they ran all around – some trying to find shelter in the cave before Cloud scared them away – and you could hear the screams of some Nibeldragons in the distance that weren’t used to such storms during hatching season.

Of course, all that chaos also woke up a certain silver haired former SOLDIER.

“What is going on?” Sephiroth was seemingly wide awake from his tone of voice.

“It started storming.”

“How much time has passed? Storms-“

“Normally don’t appear without warning. Yes, I know. But it has been only a half an hour since you fell asleep.”

“Then why-“

“Don’t know.”

Sephiroth then just looked at him with another unreadable expression.

His eyes were weird, at least for Sephiroth.

They… They weren’t the cat-like eyes that Cloud knew-

No, they were normal, or at least as normal as mako infused eyes can get.

This Sephiroth still hadn’t looked at Cloud in the way the other one had.

He wasn’t sure how they differed, but this one seemed less malicious at any rate.

Cloud turned to look at the entrance of the cave, “A helicopter from a friend comes to pick us up in a few hours, we need to wait till then.”

“Understood.”

…

This was so weird.

* * *

Gone.

Everything was gone.

All of Banora was gone.

He had destroyed it.

In his madness, he destroyed his childhood home.

He destroyed Angeals childhood home.

He destroyed every dumbapple tree.

Razed to the ground.

ShinRa hadn’t taken care of his town like they had of Nibelheim.

Should he be glad for that or not?

He had to move on.

No use dwelling on that.

He had to find his answers, and the people he cared about.

But he was tired, hungry and still had a headache.

The headache may come from the fact that he hasn’t drunken anything for some time as well.

So, he was just feeling bad in multiple ways.

Wasn’t that great?

He had to somehow get some money, to get on a boat.

And for food, and something to drink.

He needed money to live.

Maybe he should take up a few mercenary jobs, he still possessed Rapier after all.

How far has he sunken?

Once one of the three top SOLDIERS - admired by many and equally hated - with his loved ones by his side.

And now?

Now he was the guardian of the planet, yet with no resources and no help.

Completly alone once again. What else would he have deserved?

Maybe he should just tame a Chocobo…

But those oversized birds never seemed to like him, and he doubted that changed much.

No birds, he had to relay on good, old boats.

Okay, maybe not old boats, but boats overall.

“Are you Genesis Rhapsodos?”

No, Genesis hadn’t jumped.

But out of seemingly nowhere, a red-eyed man with hair as dark as the night, stood beside him,

dressed as if he jumped out of a movie, golden claw, red cape, too many belts and all.

His voice was deep and raspy, not used often.

He gave Genesis a very strong “supernatural-turk” feeling, and as thus, should be avoided.

Did... did they make supernatural turks now as well? Or were they the replacement for SOLDIERS?

Genesis snappily retorted: “Who’s asking?”

The man just blinked at him and if Genesis wouldn’t have known better, he would have assumed that this was Sephiroth’s father with how similar they are.

Maybe he should just hit him with rapier, use his materia or run…

But before he could decide, the man responded: “I am taking that as a confirmation.”

And with that, Genesis fell asleep.

The next time he woke up, he found himself in the sky.

But instead of flying himself, he flew via helicopter.

In front of him – on the other bench – sat the man that casted sleep and kidnapped him.

Genesis decided to dub him Mr. Edgelord, until he got a name.

“You are finally awake.” Spoke Edgelord.

“Finally? How long was I out then?”

“A good hour or two.”

A weak sleep spell then, either the man wasn’t that well trained in it or planned it that way.

“What do you plan to do with me?”

“Nothing bad, yo!”

…

No way. There should be no way that fucking Reno is piloting the helicopter.

How big of a chance was it even that he was now stuck with Edgelord and Reno in a Goddess damned Helicopter?

None, the chance should be zero, but wasn’t apperantly, since here he was!

In that exact situation.

At least this confirmed his suspicions about said vampiric man.

Edgelord was a Turk, or at least affiliated with them.

The only good thing that Reno being here carried with itself, was that not that much time could have passed.

Turks had notoriously short-, often on par with an SOLDIERS Lifespan.

Maybe even shorter.

Genesis had to speak up, or else he would go mad again: “If you planned nothing for me than why knock me out?” if he sounded hysterical, then none of the other two mentioned it.

“Precaution.” Edgelord answered.

“For what?” They were in the right to be scared of him, of course, but still… It was rude.

Reno decided to pipe in with: “Just a simple safety precaution. But does it matter? We soon reach Edge already.”

Edge? (He only dubbed Edgelord that as a joke, Goddess damnit) Edge of what?

If he had to guess, maybe the edge of Midgar?

Looking out of the window reveal to usual desert-like territory of the Midgar area, which was a stark contrast to the lushes, if not destroyed, fields of Banora.

But… why would they bring him to the edge of… whatever… when they saw him as a danger?

It didn’t make sense.

“Maybe try not to attack anyone on sight, yo. It’d make a mess.”

“If I would attack anyone on sight, it’d be you Reno.”

“You remembered my name, I’m flattered.”

Edgelord in front of him either fell asleep or deemed the conversation unworthy of his participation.

Again, rude.

Midgar laid in ruins.

Had he not talked about a meteor crashing into the planet?

Yes, yes, he had and apparently a meteor crashed into Midgar from the looks of it.

What was the chance of that?

Also, he had been right about Edge, it stood at the edge of the ruins of Midgar.

Genesis wasn’t sure who thought it was a good idea to build a city besides the ruins of another, but it looked… Strange.

He felt… sad at the prospect that Midgar had been destroyed as well.

Both places he once considered home now were gone.

Erased, gone forever.

Just like Angeal and Sephiroth.

They landed in front of some sort of Hospital, and within a second of landing, Edgelord decided he was too good for them and disappeared into the unknown.

Well, alright then.

“She was faster than me, yo.” Reno murmured leaving the helicopter.

“Who?”

“Tifa. She was asked to get someone too.”

Tifa? Strange name… Hadn't he heard it somewhere before?

Reno started his walk to the hospital, and Genesis got that he was supposed to follow.

From inside he heard the voice of Reeve Tuesti welcoming…someone…

Why would he welcome anyone into a hospital?

Since when was Tuesti even involved in anything medical?

The door was wide, and he saw the silhouettes of two people on the left side of the door, thus he entered on the right side.

  
“And here we already have the second guest of honor today, welcome in Edge Mister Rhapsodos.”

Second one? The first must have gotten the other welcome shortly before.

He wanted to ask why Reeve of all people welcomed him but couldn’t since someone spoke up with a: “Genesis!” very loudly and surprised.

Since he knew the voice, he looked to the owner of it to his left.

“Zackary!”

Zack indeed stood there, breathing and looking like he hadn’t aged a day - yet looked even worse for wear, somehow.

The lovely nicknamed ‘Puppy’ threw his arms into the air in an exaggerated fashion while exclaiming:

“How often to I have to tell you that my name is just Zack! Not Zackery!”

“As often as I don’t believe that any parents would name their kid Zack.”

“And Genesis is that much better of a name?”

“You stole that one from Cloud and yes, my name is amazing.”

Zack’s just gotten ready to get back at that when Reeve cleared his throat and fell into the argument with a… rather strained smile: “While it is nice to see you two getting along, I would really like to get the check-ups out of the way.”

Genesis now looked to Reeve again, looking away from Zack’s lovely face. “Check-up? I was never told about this.”

At this point, Reno – who just entered the building – added himself annoyingly to the conversation again.

“Why did you think we went to a hospital, yo?”

Genesis gave up years ago to get Reno to drop the constant ‘yo’s

“He’s got a point.” Zack added.

“Let’s just get this over with.” Genesis took right after Reeve, who walked into a rather big elevator…

* * *

_He had messed up._

_He messed up during a mission no less._

_While his squad somehow managed to rectify the situation, he still had to get punished in some way._

_Cleaning the weapons, help cooking, or just being one of Heidegger’s verbal punching bags._

_It could honestly just suck, and in his case as a series offender, he had to do more than one._

_…_

_He got suck with cleaning and garden duty._

_Cleaning duty was the before mentioned taking care of weapons._

_Scrapping the blood of, polishing them… just taking care of them overall._

_It took a long time and was just tedious._

_Garden duty was something else._

_He never had to do it before, considering it’s only ever given to one person, and that only if SOLDIER first Angeal Hewley wasn’t present._

_The garden was by no means big, and most people weren’t even aware of the fact that it existed._

_To maintain it, ShinRa had to ship in dirt from outside of Midgar, and even then… most plants died…_

_Midgar just wasn’t a good place for them._

_It started out as some kind of PR-move and only really continued because of Commander Hewleys interest in taking care of it himself._

_But... he was a first and as such, often out of the city… at that point, people like Cloud had to jump in._

_Rumor was, that it was the worst punishment, because if you did something wrong here – overwatering or trimming or, dear Odin, forgetting either one – then you would get an extra punishment from Hewley himself…_

_So yeah, bad time all around…_

_Especially because he had to do it on top of his regular duties…_

_Which just sucked._

_And he had to go through the gardening schedule with the Commander beforehand, and…._

_He couldn’t do that._

_He would just… stop functioning…_

_That…_

_He…_

_Cloud would rather do anything else than that…_

_Except maybe complementing Heidegger, that would be worse, yes…_

_Zack always told him that Commander Hewley was stern and “all focused on discipline and honor and stuff”, but outside of work rather nice._

_Or…well… Zack could drone on for hours about how awesome his mentor was…_

_But that didn’t make Cloud’s situation any less stressful, especially since he didn’t know if the garden counted to the work or casual side…_

_Anyway…_

_As he started to do in the past few weeks, he went to that one roof again… where mister Unknown waited with his usual collection of fragrances._

_“What ruffled your feathers this time so badly, little bird?”_

_“I am still not a bird.”_

_The nights remained dark in Midgar, only illuminated by the city itself, so the identity of the mystery man still remain… well… unknown…_

_But the man saw him apparently, which wasn’t creepy at all._

_Cloud had figured out some time ago that the man was some kind of SOLDIER, due to having caught a glimpse of his glowing eyes._

_Quite bright glowing eyes._

_“My friend, the fates are cruel”_

_Unknown started a competition of throwing every quote out of LOVELESS at him over the past weeks, just to find out how deep Cloud’s memorization went._

_“LOVELESS act 4, I know, I know_

_There are no dreams, no honor remains…”_

_“What got you in such a foul mood today?”_

_‘My squad sucks.’ ‘I am apparently the equivalent of the tail of a lizard in the eyes of my Squad leader since he keeps throwing me under the bus.’ Or the simple-_

_“I am stuck with cleaning and gardening duty due to idiocy.”_

_“Your idiocy or someone else’s?”_

_“Overall idiocy.”_

_“You’re going to deal with that for a long time to come…”_

_“Figured as much”_

_Had to deal with that his entire life till now, didn’t expect it to change._

_“Also, gardening duty?”_

_How far up was this guy to not know about gardening duty?_

_Even some SOLDIERS complained about it, - or at least according to Kunsel they did - so it must exist there as well…_

_Was this guy just high enough to avoid it and the mere mention of it?_

_Wait, his eyes were really bright- at least brighter then Zacks, and that would mean-_

_Abort train of thought. Reply to his Question, please._

_“Yes, I’ll get to meet Commander Hewley tomorrow.” He complained._

_“I thought that normally people sound more enthusiastic at that.”_

_“That man is scary, not sure what to tell you…”_

_A loud laugh that encompassed the whole roof, if not even more resounded from the mystery SOLDIER._

_“Angeal? Scary? Normally people say that about me.”_

_Cloud was not exactly sure how he was supposed to respond to that-_

_Okay, scratch that, he was never sure of anything._

_But… he didn’t really like what mister unknown just suggested…_

_He call Commander Hewley by his first name without any hesitation…_

_And people being scared of him?_

_LOVELESS_

_The bright eyes..._

_His previous train of thought had been right-_

_How hadn’t he connected it before?_

_But that would mean-_

_He had-_

_For the love of Freya, he had been shit talking his sqaud and head of operations for the past weeks to Genesis fucking Rhapsodos-_

_He had been talking to one of the top-standing SOLDIERS for the past weeks-_

_Cloud couldn't take the man serious anymore._

_He heard a few too many LOVELESS quotes and their weird interpretations from the man._

_He witnessed a few too many rants and gushes about everything ranging from theatre to the mans hometown, to the newest LOVELESS comic-adaptation._

_“It’s hard to be scared of someone that constantly quotes LOVELESS at you.”_

_“Most people find me scary despite that.”_

_He never had Genesis in training, but he was sure that teh other cadets had always made fun of the LOVELESS quoting, to the point Cloud just started to ignore it…_

_“I think that is because you tend to throw fire at them.”_

_“Yes, because their ‘overall idiocy’ gets on my nerv-_

_You’re onto my identity, aren’t you little bird?”_

_You weren’t being supple, and I was just a dense idiot like usual…_

_“Still aren’t a bird.”_

_“Don’t change the subject.”_

_“Infinite in mystery is the gift of the goddess, but I fear not your identity Commander Rhapsodos.”_

_“Great use of the quote. You’re learning birdie, but please, outside of work you can call me Genesis.”_

_“As long as you call me anything relating to a bird, I will not call you by your name outside of work then.”_

_“Oh, not mister of the unknown anymore? I’m tragedy stricken.”_

_“You are not much of an unknown anymore, are you?”_

_“You still have to see me, little bird.”_

_“There are thousands of pictures of you online, please, that is even less of a mystery.”_

_“It’s not my fault that I am so photogenic.”_

_“Yeah, people like to photograph anomalies.”_

_“You wound me, my friend…”_

_“Oh, if it wounds you so much, my companion, then reveal thyself. Show me thy mystery of the night.”_

_“Laying on thick now, are we?”_

_Yes, all or nothing now._

_“With you? Always.”_

_After another chuckle a man clad in red leather stepped out of the darkness of the building._

_Cloud still couldn’t believe that he was actually talking to him_

_Okay, this was weird._

_seeing the man was a whole other caliber than just seening and thinking it._

_The man hold himself like one would expect someone so full of themself, straight back, perfect hair and an overall rather extravagant fashion sense._

_You would seriously not think he just crawled out of whatever he was hiding behind…_

_Why was this man spending time with him? Surly one of the other firsts would have more to say than a lonely infantry man and SOLDIER-failure?_

_Genesis whipped his hair like, you know, an obnoxious person. “I know I am handsome, no need to stare.”_

_He was staring?_

_Oh Odin, he was staring._

_How much of a failure was Cloud actually?_

_“I wasn’t starring due to that; your coat is just… really… disgusting.”_

_It wasn’t a complete lie, it really was… not great…_

_“You took quite a long time to formulate that response.”_

_Excuse him, it was not an everyday occurance you talk to a first class SOLDIER face to face, much less even just seeing them upclose._

_He may be used to talking to the man, but seeing was truly a different experience._

_And the man was basically a giant, nit that Zack was any better in that regard, but it was still somewhat intimidating._

_“I tried to be nice. No need to hurt your confidence any more than most of – anyone in ShinRa really – already does.”_

_“Please, the people love me.”_

_“Eh, wouldn’t say love. Horror stories are being told about you on long missions.”_

_“Yeah, I mean, that is my image.”_

_Why would he want that image, and why did he think quoting LOVELESS was a good way to maintain it?_

_Oh right, he had two Fanclubs that adore that about him…_

_“Shame, destroyed that for me by now.”_

_The Commander sat down beside him, looking over the stretching cityscape before them._

_It was honestly… kind of nice._

_“Oh, and Angeal is that much worse than me?”_

_“Now? Yes. I doubt he goes around quoting LOVELESS at random people and hanging around on dark and creepy rooftops.”_

_“That makes me not scary to you? You have a twisted sense of what that means then.”_

_“Oh no, not really. I just knew what to expect from a creepy person on a roof, but… What should I expect by Commander Hewley on gardening duty?”_

_“Angeal is a fucking teddy bear most of the time. He will give you a plan on everything in his garden, that is so detailed that you just have to follow it step by step, and if you mess that up, then you are ‘let’s jump in front of danger willingly’- stupid.”_

_“Sounds like it comes from experience.”_

_“I’ve seen to many people do that for a lifetime…”_

_“I’ve seen a lot of people try to tame a Nibelwolf and coming back with a missing appendage.”_

_“Sounds like a blast.”_

_Cloud just gave a grunt at that, he never really liked any of them… and they seemed to share the sentiment._

_Having apparently noticed the shift in atmosphere, Genesis waved the topic off, and continued with a pointed: “Angeal truly won’t bite you, so don’t worry your pretty little head off.”_

_“I will always worry my head off.”_

_His mom used to tell him that it was due to that, that his hair stood up like it did…_

_Something, something, hair spiking to look more intimidating._

_Or, something…_

_Was fear and worry the same thing or just the same group?_

_“You know, I have a bunch of stories of Geal doing stupid stuff and I am more than willing to share them.”_

_He what?_

_Gossip and other stupid things about the firsts?_

_Especially things about Zack’s teacher he could tell him?_

_Count him in._

_“Then you have found a willing ear.”_

_A loud laugh rang out again. Genesis wore an extremely amused and joyful expression, like he just got told the most amazing news of the week, if not month. Once he had calmed down, he grinned at Cloud and told him to buckle up._

_“So, it’s kind of an open secret that Angeal loves dogs, but never actually owned one._

_So, due to that, he once kidnapped one of the piglets of one of the farms in Banora, gave it a pair of dog ears and put in on a leash to show his mother how great he could take care of a dog… Of course, that backfired-_

_The rest of the night was filled with similar stories, and sometimes Cloud even pitched in a few things of his experiences here and there…_

_By the end of the night, Cloud had to say that Angeal Hewley didn’t seem as scary anymore._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have noticed I love to write banter between past Cloud and Genesis and so they have taken over the past segment again, even though it was supposed to be Angeal's turn and Gen was only supposed to show up shortly to laugh at the prospect of Cloud being scared of Angeal, but he just kind of took the part and ran away with it.  
> So... Angeal's past-part has got to wait till next chapter...
> 
> And again, if you have any criticism, just leave it in the comments...
> 
> So, till next chapter.


	3. Change over time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cloud got ahold of a small piece of his memory, Genesis realized Zack had changed a bit, Angeal reunites with someone, Zack has breakfast and Sephiroth tries to come to terms with what had happened the past few years.  
> This time, past Angeal wonders how someone's hair can be so spikey and soft at the same time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, as you may have seen in the tags, I have decided to age up Cloud and Zack a bit.  
> That overall should mess with the timeline a bit, but basically, Zack simply was two years older when he left Gongaga, to become a SOLDIER, the rest is roughly the same for him.  
> For Cloud meanwhile, it’s a bit harder, but to make things in Nibelheim still fit, Tifa is also fittingly older now – or rather just everyone from Nibelheim would be four years older.  
> Meaning, Tifa was still the same age in canon when her mother died, and she went climbing mount Nibel, while Cloud followed her. So that all still happened. I don’t think it really matters if Aerith is aged up as well, so I’ll leave that up for interpretation.  
> Also, to make more time for bonding, the events involving and after Genesis’ dissertation happen two years later, meaning most of crisis core, the original FF7 and advent children happen two years later, meaning everyone would be two years older, but despite that, everything still happened pretty much the same as in the original canon… so, Denzel still landed by Cloud, even if he was two years older…
> 
> Also, I changed a bit of the past-part of the last chapter, so... just for info

„Do you hate me?“

„I could ask you the same thing.”

“That is not an answer.”

“I know”

Cloud understood why Sephiroth would ask him that, but he truly held no answer for it.

If he had asked Cloud two years ago, he would have said yes, without question.

But now? He was less than unsure.

He just didn’t know.

He felt suspicion towards the man, but also a desire to keep an open mind.

Cloud had all the rights to hate Sephiroth.

The one-winged angel just couldn’t seem to leave him alone.

He had haunted parts of his childhood – that Cloud managed to recover – with an unreachable ideal, goading him to leave his Mother and Tifa behind to work for ShinRa.

Sephiroth then had burned his hometown to the ground, destroying any chance he of consolidating with his mother ever again – Cloud still couldn't even remember her name, and Tifa only ever knew her as Ms. Strife – and leading Hojo to turn him into an experiment.

After five years, Sephiroth had come back to initiate Reunion, used their weird cellular bond to control Cloud and make him give up the black materia, which ultimately caused Aerith’s death and the destruction of Midgar.

And even after all that, he still couldn’t relax.

Geostigma had ravaged the population of Edge and later on even Cloud himself.

The Remnants had come after, causing even more deaths of civilians, only for Sephiroth to come back as well and drag him into another battle.

Even now, after everything, he came back to haunt him in his memories of times past – of quiet evenings and worrisome missions.

So, did he hate Sephiroth?

Not really.

Where would Sephiroth’s ambition end and JENOVA’s manipulation begin?

And depending on that, was Sephiroth not in a similar boat to Cloud?

If you blame the silver general for Meteorfall, then Cloud must also be at fault because of the black materia.

Geostigma had been a machination by JENOVA, to begin with, and the Remnants were in the same vein.

The flashes of memories didn’t seem to be influenced by Sephiroth himself, or else he wouldn’t spout random facts about the past with the expectation that Cloud understood them.

The only thing that Cloud blamed him for was Nibelheim, really, and he never liked that many people there to begin with.

And again, the argument could be made that Sephiroth had already been under JENOVA’s influence.

So… his feelings were conflicted.

This whole conversation began because Cloud decided to spend the time they had, till the Helicopter send from Reeve finally arrived, telling Sephiroth of the happenings of the past.

Cloud left the names of any Avalanche members out and only mentioned what was known to the public.

Meaning he left out everything personal.

But during all of that, the man’s expression kept steady, never-changing much.

Sephiroth never expressed sorrow, glee, or sadness, at the end of everything he held only the expression of regret.

The Sephiroth that Cloud remembered the most had been untouchable.

No flaws were to be seen, no signs of weakness. With his cat-like gaze being able to burn a hole through one’s soul.

He appeared otherworldly, nothing human other than his outer shape – fitting for the son of JENOVA.

But now? With his sunken eyes and haunted look, slight tremble and complete refusal to meet Cloud’s eyes.

With the weakness that sneaked its way into his question, he seemed so very much human.

And, most importantly, it caused a sense of déjà vu in Cloud, as if he had seen him like that before.

_It was rare that Sephiroth called on him during his work hours, but when it happened it was often urgent. They had agreed some time ago already that neither Sephiroth nor Zack was allowed to pull rank to get Cloud out of work unless it was for an emergency._

_Thus, when he had gotten the text message on his PHS from Sephiroth to come, he told his superior that he felt kind of sick – the older man was a veteran who had been with the company since before SOLDIER had even been established and had the tendency to treat every one of the privates in his squadron as a family – and was subsequently send home._

_There he made a beeline to Sephiroth’s apartment, where he could easily get inside with his keycard._

_On the couch in the living room, sat the silver general, with his head in his hands._

_He hadn’t even looked up when Cloud had entered, just sat there._

_Cloud himself firstly put off the heavier parts of his uniform – mostly his helmet, boots, and the shoulder pads – and sat down beside Sephiroth._

_He was trembling slightly, and once he noticed Cloud beside him, looked a bit up._

_He had a question for Cloud, and asked in a tone of voice that no one outside of their relationship must have ever heard from the general: “Cloud, do you hate me?”_

_Cloud lifted his hands and put one of them slowly on Sephiroth’s shoulder – to make his intentions as obvious as possible – and turned with the other one’s Sephiroth’s head to look at him._

_Cloud gave him a small smile and said in a soft tone: “No, of course not. I have no reason to.”_

_Sephiroth’s eyes looked sunken like this had been plaguing him for a long time already._

_Despite what a lot of other people in the company said, Sephiroth was just as human as any of them, with fears, guilt, and grievances as any of them._

_Losing a loved one hurt him as much as any other._

_Sephiroth broke the eye contact the continue staring holes into the floor_

_“After Modeoheim, I figured you and Zack must despise me.”_

_So that was the problem._

_Modeoheim had ripped an already existing hole in their relationship even further apart as it already had been, it shocked them all, but it scared Zack especially, physically and emotionally._

_He looked at the Bustersword like it held all his answers._

_Why Angeal thought it was a good idea to burden Zack with it, why Sephiroth send him to Modeoheim, why both Angeal and Genesis left them behind._

_But Cloud couldn’t speak for Zack, only for himself._

_“I don’t blame you.”_

_This caused Sephiroth to recoil almost as if he had been hit._

_He looked at Cloud with wide eyes: “ But I am a coward.”_

_This caused Cloud to laugh, truly._

_Sephiroth a coward?_

_What?_

“Cloud, is everything alright?”

Sephiroth’s voice dragged him out of the memory and back into reality.

This had been the most vivid memory he had recovered.

But it brought up so many questions.

Why did he have a keycard to Sephiroth’s apartment? What had happened in Modeoheim?

And who were Angeal and Genesis?

But he had no time to find an answer for that because outside of the cave stood one Cid Highwind with an expression that just screamed that he was done with all this shit and Cloud could only agree with that sentiment.

“If you two are done with staring at each other, then get up. I’m supposed to pick ya up and then go up to icicle to pick someone else up as well.”

Cloud raised an eyebrow “Who else are you supposed to pick up?”

“Some Angeal Hewley…”

Cloud saw out of the corner of his eye how sephiroth took a shocking step forward: “Are you sure that was the right name”

“Yes, I am fucking sure, Maniac.”

And with that, they were on their way to the northern continent.

* * *

Zack had changed.

Genesis maybe – no, definitely – should have noticed that already back during their squirmish in Banora, but he had been occupied by… something else at that moment.

So, to see the overgrown puppy had… actually grown-up was kind of jarring.

It could even be called uncanny.

The world moving on was expected, similarly was it expected that his former lovers would move on as well, but it had hurt.

Looking back on it, it was good that they moved on, it really was – but the hurt he felt was like someone tied a string around his heart and would, whenever he thought about them, tug on it.

And that wouldn’t feel suffocating as a rope or chain would have, and rather like someone was cutting his heart, letting him bleed out slowly.

And with each tug the wound got bigger and more blood would spill out, quickening the process and making him lash out faster, like a wounded animal.

Genesis couldn’t let it come to that, he would only hurt them again.

In the short while that he actually managed to see Zack, he seemed so… sullen, depressed almost.

What had happened?

Cloud had been with Zack the last time Genesis saw them – where was he now?

Cloud had been rather… sick when he had confronted Zack, so maybe meeting each other again wouldn’t end so well…

Why was Zack even here?

Genesis himself was here because he was technically missing the last nine years and this… WRO wanted to make sure he wouldn’t go crazy again – or that were the reasons he suspected

But, had Zack also been missing?

Had he went into hiding with Cloud and only he was found?

That made sense right?

He… wouldn’t have died or something – Genesis knew he could have been counted as dead these past years, so… it could be possible…

Both of them had been split up into different rooms before they had their blood taken.

It was not an unknown experience, Hollander had taken a blood test of both him and Angeal almost on the daily, yet it was weird to get one after what felt like such a long time.

Part of him was scared they would use his blood for nefarious deeds.

Once that was done, Genesis had been told that he couldn’t yet leave, at least till they got the results.

It was evening by now, and it began storming outside.

A short while ago, they brought dinner – not nearwhere as good as anything Angeal could do, but better than almost anything he ate in recent memory.

So, in the meanwhile, he took the time to read through the two booklets these people had given him.

It laid together with a sightseeing guild of Edge and its cultural monuments.

The booklets had apparently been given to the public for free to explain what had happened these past years, or rather explain the biggest happenings.

A so-called event called ‘Meteorfall’, and an ‘Advent day’.

Only skimming would have to suffice till later, he did not possess the patience to read it thoroughly right now

The first truly notable event would have to be the dropping of the sector seven plate.

No evacuation, no prior warning, ShinRa had just dropped the plate to get rid of a few terrorists.

Quite an extreme overreaction – Genesis found it amusing that the booklet didn’t even try to put the blame somewhere else.

Then the president had been murdered – the sucker on his high horse had deserved it.

The next truly important step listed had been the freeing of the WEAPONS of the planet and simultaneously the summoning of this meteor.

The latter having been orchestrated by Sephiroth – which made no sense since the silver general died in Nibelheim – and was consequently defeated by some sort of renewed Avalanche branch who had been branded enemies of ShinRa beforehand – wasn’t that ironic.

Midgar had been destroyed by Meteor and ShinRa subsequently fell apart. Established beside it was Edge – Genesis still hadn’t understood why someone thought that was a good idea – and two years later, the so-called ‘Advent day’ happened where a Bahamut SIN was summoned and another Sephiroth appeared.

On the second occasion a man clad in black – similar to the SOLDIER first uniform – was seen fight the dubbed ‘one-winged angel’(so this version of Sephiroth also had some signs of degradation).

This man could have only been a former SOLDIER, no one else could have stood against Sephiroth.

He should check in with Zack, depending on his circumstances for being here, this could hit him harder than it did with Genesis.

The room in which Zack could be found was just opposite to his own, he knocked on it. No answer.

He knocked again. Again, no answer. On his third knock an annoyed sounding: “I’m coming, I’m coming, calm down.” rung out.

Zack looked even worse for wear, his eyes had a slightly red tinge and looked a bit glassy, he had cried.

“What is it Genesis?” he bit.

He deflated a bit, he never heard Zack sound so… done with life.

“Is everything alright?”

Zack let out a humorless laugh “Is everything alright? Midgar lays in ruins, many of the people living there died due to Geostigma, and I have no idea if Cloud had gotten mixed up in any of it due to his horrible luck – of course, everything is alright, why do you even ask?”

“Laying it on thick there with the sarcasm, aren’t you?”

“Laying it on thick there with the obnoxiousness, aren’t you?”

Ouch, that kinda hurt.

“Listen, Zack, I understand that my actions were horrible, but there is nothing I can do to change that now and I am trying to be better, so please, let me at least try to help.”

Zack just stared at him for a second, averted his eyes and he let out a sigh “Sorry for snapping like it’s just…” he looked square into Genesis's eyes and tried to formulate his sentence “It’s just that-“ his breath became more ragged “after everything-“ he broke eye contact again, instead of letting them dart around from place to place “I just can’t-“

Genesis put a hand on the other’s shoulder “Breath Zack, tell me five things you can see.”

Upon hearing that, Zack gave him an unsure glance and took a deep breath.

“You, the white hallway, the back of the door, the door to the bathroom, and a strand of my hair.”

Zack took another deep breath. Genesis nodded “Good, four things you can hear.”

Closing his eyes, Zack began counting “My breathing, the nurse in the office yelling at her coworker, the fly buzzing around and the wind outside.”

Genesis nodded again and gave him a small smile “Great, now three things you can feel.”

Keeping his eyes closed and steadily taking deep breaths now, he continued “The door handle, the insoles of my boots, and your hand on my shoulder.

“You’re doing amazing Dahlia, now two things you can smell.”

“The leather of your jacket and the disinfectants the hospital uses”

“It’s a coat, not a jacket” That earned him a small laugh from Zack, good. “Now, lastly, one thing you can taste.”

Zack now opened his eyes and looked at him again “Blood”

“Excuse me, what!” he took his hand from Zack’s shoulder,

Zack let out a light chuckle now “I just bit the inside of my cheek while eating a short while ago, don’t worry too much”

Genesis shook his head “It’s hard to not worry about you.”

In response he got a grin “Awe, you care.”

He nodded “Yeah, of course, I do, now, be honest, are you alright?”

“Yeah” Zack placed a hand on his own neck “The stress just kind of got to me, you know? Mostly just wanna sleep now.”

“If you need anything, be it just a word of reassurance, come knock – even in the dead of night, understood?”

A small smile graced the other's face “Thanks Gen, and good night.”

“Night Dahlia”

Zack gave him a last small wave and closed the door.

He would visit tomorrow morning again.

* * *

The world had changed a lot in the past ten years, and Angeal knew not what to make of it.

All the articles, the video, and the connectivity of the world overall seemed so surreal to him.

The doctor who had talked to him that first day had become his primary doctor here.

She had given him a laptop that belonged to the hospital, for him to research the past few years on, and a few keywords to look up.

In turn, they had wanted to perform a blood test, which was apparently a mandate for any former SOLDIERS – he was unsure of the reason, he thought only Genesis, himself, and maybe Sephiroth were in danger of degradation.

No matter, he had been told that he would be transferred to a city called Edge so that the test could be completed.

Online he couldn’t find anything about Genesis's fate, not what he was doing nor if he had died – even his Fanclub seemed almost completely wiped out, the last real entry being an announcement for some annual fest dating back to before Meteorfall – ShinRa maybe had a hand in that before their downfall.

Zack was also non-existed on the web, not even a trace could be found – maybe also due to ShinRa.

The only thing he could find about Cloud was a link to a site advertising a postal service called “Strife delivery service” – which was currently not in service, due to unknown reasons.

It sounded like something related to Cloud – mostly since ‘Strife’ wasn’t really a common last name – and the fact that it would let him drive his motorcycle, that he must have by now, as much as he wanted and deemed to see fit. The emblem of the delivery service was what seemed to be the head of a wolf. Their headquarters was in Edge, and he should check it out when he went there.

Researching Sephiroth had been a whole different beast.

According to older sources, he had died – no other pieces of information, seemed fitting for ShinRa’s secrecy surrounding him – but newer sources report that he had been responsible for Meteorfall, which would mean that he would have started degrading as well, or otherwise went mad – the Sephiroth he knew wouldn’t have done anything close to that.

Then after being stopped, he had reappeared two years later to once again rain down destruction on the people of Midgar that during the two events had built the city of Edge to the east of Midgar, only to be killed again.

So, in conclusion, he had no idea what any of them were doing at the moment.

Angeal didn’t really have to pack, considering he didn’t really actually own anything other than the clothes that he was wearing. That meant when a nurse had given him his papers and told him to wait outside where one Cid Highwind would pick him up, he was ready to go.

Cid himself had shown up a short while thereafter. The captain was gruff and mumbled something about being stuck with too many errands runs nowadays, which made Angeal feel something along the lines of pity any sympathy.

“Don’t have anything more to carry, eh?”

Angeal nodded.

“That’s good. Blondie’s motorcycle was way too fucking annoying to secure already.”

Blondie? Motorcycle? Must be a coincidence, right?

Had Cid picked up others before him? It would make sense, but he hadn’t expected it.

He decided to just ask:” So there are more passengers than me?”

Cid let out a gruff laugh “Of course, I wouldn’t fly all the way to Edge just to deliver one person.”

The captain also explained that his airship – Shera – was parked outside of Icicle due to space reasons, so they would have to walk a bit.

He wished that Cid would have warned him, but he hadn’t and so he was completely unprepared to see Sephiroth and someone else sit in the passenger bay.

To say it was shocking would be an understatement.

Sephiroth just outright stared at him, like he was seeing a ghost, which considering the circumstances he may as well think.

For the fact that the silver general was supposed to be dead three times over, he looked fairly normal.

His hair was staying in place, as usual, his clothes show little sign of wear, and despite what the videos online showed, there was no wing spreading out on his back. But his had disappeared upon resurrection as well and if Sephiroth truly had died and come back then it would only be natural that his wing would be missing as well.

But his expression was completely new.

Sephiroth never had shown much emotion with his face, often leaving it in his schooled neutral expression, and if he displayed something, it would never be… this.

This shock, this desperation – as if someone offered him the answers to his questions, but he couldn’t afford to believe it.

Sephiroth had stood up from his seat upon seeing him immediately, one foot forward ready to move forward once he had been assured that this wasn’t just a dream.

Angeal himself had been standing frozen in the entrance which Cid had shown him

He felt like his breath had left him.

“Angeal” The silver general took a step forward, “is that truly you?”

He was at a loss for words, nothing would suffice for this moment.

So he just nodded.

And before he realized what happened, he was enveloped in a hug.

It felt huge and sloppy and oh so desperate, but it was pure relief, for both parties.

He came crashing into Angeal at a fast pace and if the man hadn’t stood so rooted to the ground, they would have fallen out of the passengers bay.

Sephiroth trembled slightly – he was crying in his way too quiet, cut-off sobs that would remain completely invisible if you wouldn’t know what to look for and that brought the tears to Angeal as well.

When he read that Sephiroth may have died, it hadn’t really hit yet, now that he was holding and seeing and feeling the man’s arm around him - grounding him – it hit him like a truck.

And he cried.

He cried like on the first evening of his deployment in Wutai, like when he realized that he would be dragging Zack and later on Cloud into that kind of life as well. He cried the same tears that he shed when he found out Genesis’s reason for desertion and felt his own mentality slipping.

And it hurt – and felt like such a relief.

He was able to hold Sephiroth again, and the others once he found them.

After what felt like an eternity, they both let go – only really because Cid shouted through the speaker that they should sit down or what happened then would not be his fault – and Angeal was able to get a look of Sephiroth’s face up close.

He really didn’t seem to have aged, still possessed that otherworldly, untouchable beauty, but he looked tired and worn out.

After another moment or two, Sephiroth had glanced behind at the man that was still sitting there, and only then had Angeal realized who that might have been.

The man clad in a black outfit sat on one of the passenger's seats and had his head turned away from them, only observing them from the corner of his eyes. Besides him laid a sort of Buster-style sword, seemingly made up of other smaller blades, ready to be taken apart and put back together.

The most eye-catching part must have been his hair, blond and standing up like a Chocobo's feathers.

All of that coupled with Cid’s comment about a Blondie’s motorcycle, then he could only guess that it was actually Cloud Strife sitting before him.

A Cloud Strife that was ten years older and looked like he went through the worst life could give him and came back alive.

Alive, but unable to meet Angeal’s eyes.

After what Angeal had done, he could hardly blame him.

But it still stung.

The last time Angeal had talked to him, Cloud was as much a wreck as any of them – Genesis’ desertation had hurt them all. But he still had been the same eager and determined cadet that he came to know.

Standing tall even when it seemed as if the world was stacked against him, getting back up – trying again and again – no matter what stood in his way.

With what almost seemed like an endless amount of energy when it came to bettering himself, which would go lost once it had something to do with interacting with his peers.

The cadet that had acted as if everyone hated him and the prospect of someone other than his mom caring was taken straight from fantasy.

The cadet that had been so earnest in proving himself, that he overlooked everything he had already achieved.

The cadet that was no longer a cadet and now sitting in front of him with an unreadable expression on his face that showed no sign of love nor hatred.

The former cadet that looked at him like he met never him.

A deep sense of dread seemed to spread in Angeal’s stomach – deep and all-encompassing – seemingly absorbing all the joy the reunion with Sephiroth had brought.

Said man looked at Angeal with sullen, resigned despair – as if he had already come to terms with what had happened.

Cloud meanwhile just kept looking between Angeal and Sephiroth, as if gauging what kind of bond was between the both of them – as if he didn’t know.

As if he didn’t know who Angeal was.

Angeal had kept his eyes on Cloud then, hoping for anything, any kind of reaction.

Be it a tentative smile, a hatred or sorrow-filled grimace, or a despaired sadness.

But nothing.

And once the blond had met his eyes his fears were realized.

The man had tilted his head, looked at him straight on – leaving no room for doubt – and asked:

“Who are you?”

* * *

After his outburst at Genesis not so long ago, he had truly been tired – like he told the LOVELESS fanatic, but he just couldn’t seem to catch some shut-eye.

Whenever he closed his eyes he was back on that cliff, and for him, it was only a handful of hours ago.

Midgar at his back, facing too many Infantry soldier to count – all to protect what had been the last of his lovers, or at least the only one who had yet to die or go completely mad.

He understood them or tried to at least, they either couldn’t anything against it or were somewhat justified.

But their resulting actions were less so.

The worst betrayal he felt was Sephiroth’s.

He knew where Sephiroth was coming from, what had been written in those documents was completely outrageous, but there were so many problems with the documents themselves and Sephiroth’s following conclusion.

He just hadn’t been well mentally, if he even ever was.

So, truthfully, he wouldn’t blame them for their actions, they were all just victims of ShinRa’s messed up morals – and now they all had that in common.

But he still was angry, the irrational part that was still wounded from Genesis’ original betrayal cried out when he had seen him hours ago, screaming for repentance and almost even revenge.

But now, he had been the one to leave someone else behind, someone that was more than likely involved with the whole Meteorfall and Advent day business.

And now, whenever he lied down to sleep, all of his emotions would come rushing back, with nothing to stop them and they were keeping him awake – what could he have done differently? What had he done wrong? Where had he gone wrong? – circling round and round in his head till he worked himself up into another frenzy and needed to calm down again.

He needed to talk with Tifa tomorrow morning.

After a few more hours of more pacing around, he finally passed out on his bed – it wasn’t really relaxing or regenerative, but it was sleep – and was awoken in the morning by the nurse dropping of his breakfast.

It was simple, a few slices of bread, some butter, a bit of marmalade and honey, and a few slices of cheese, finished off with a few different pieces of fruits, berries, and yogurt. To drink they had given him a bottle of water and some juice.

So, overall it was nothing really special – and even not really enough for a SOLDIER – but it was the best food he had in a long time.

And almost as soon as he finished his breakfast a knock could be heard from the door.

But it wasn’t a normal knock, it was Genesis’ knock.

The redhead had this really specific way of knocking, two long – almost patient – knocks, and one fast one, and Zack just knew the man was announcing his presence that way.

He had always done that, to the point of it not having been really notable anymore.

But what had the man wanted now? Zack actually wanted to ask someone if they could contact Tifa so he could ask her more about Cloud’s status, but now he would have to deal with Genesis first.

When he had seen the man the first time in the hospital, it almost felt like a burden had been taken off his back – because Genesis was very much Genesis again and not crazy anymore – but then that nasty feeling of… destain crept up again and he had to separate himself from the man as fast as possible.

But a large part of Zack wanted to make things right with the former general again, so simply dismissing him would feel wrong.

Another one of Genesis’ knocks resounded.

Zack had to answer this time or the other man would get impatient. “Door’s open!”

And with that, the leather-clad man had already stepped in.

The man still wore the same clothes that he did yesterday – Zack had changed into a pajama set given to him by the hospital during his restless pacing – and looked at him with a lazy smirk on his face, “So, slept well ?”

Zack shrugged “About as well as I could have” which wasn’t technically a lie.

Genesis came in further into the room and sat down beside him on the bed, where Zack had just been eating. “Apparently they plan on telling us how it goes on from here, once two other people that they are waiting for come in.”

Zack let out a chuckle “Found that out by spying on the nurses, didn’t you?”

“Of course I did” the other let out a huff and then went serious “Do you think the other two could be…” he left the question open.

Zack took a sip of water and thought for a moment before responding: “Could be anyone really but considering the circumstances, it might as well be.”

“Which circumstances?”

He scratched his head, Aerith never said he was the only one brought back, Gaia might as well have brought the others back – but that was such an absurd and almost scary thought.

If Gaia deemed it necessary to bring back people that were connected with her enemy, then something must have clearly gone haywire, but the question was what.

What had gone wrong?

* * *

Sephiroth was happy, how could he not be?

Seeing Angeal again, embracing him, feeling actual proof was so freeing.

Witnessing his reaction to Cloud’s current state, less so – if not rather the opposite.

He wished he could have warned him, just some small direct signal, but they never established a wordless signal for “Memory loss” as they had with “bad mood”, “laboratory” or “Bad mission”.

They never required it before.

Cloud’s question must have been the final nail in the coffin since Angeal had shut down directly afterward.

He hadn’t even managed a response, just stared at Cloud as if the blond was decapitated right in front of him.

Cloud then looked at Sephiroth as if asking if he said something wrong.

Which Sephiroth could not fault him for – he hadn’t expected that reaction either.

So he cleared his throat, Sephiroth had to fix this.

“This is Angeal Hewley, former first class SOLDIER, and mentor of Zack.”

“Huh,” he peered back at Angeal for a moment, before turning back to Sephiroth. “Is he alright?”

Angeal had yet to stop staring at Cloud, who meet his intense gaze with a rather confused one.

Sephiroth just shifted his gaze between the two.

…

Okay.

…

Their battle of sight was interrupted by Shera taking flight again, leading to Angeal and Sephiroth– who had both remained standing the entire time – to nearly falling completely over.

The upside to this showed itself since it had shocked Angeal out of whatever trance he had found himself in.

The man gave Cloud a clearly fake and strained smile “Could you excuse us for a second?” and dragged with that Sephiroth to the small medical bay adjacent to the passenger bay.

The blond only threw them an even more confused look but made no move to follow them.

In the med bay, Angeal had taken to pace up and down, not like a beast and more like when he had been worried because of something stupid that Zack had done.

He looked desperate, his face was adorned with a frown, and his eyes looked for an answer that couldn’t be found here.

After what must have been five minutes he turned to the former silver general.

“Sephiroth is that truly-“

“Yes, no question about it.”

“What happened?”

“I don’t know.”

“When-“

“Sometime between the last nine years and yesterday.”

“The last nine- Sephiroth why…” Angeal now came to a complete halt and turned to face the silver general completely. “Sephiroth did you truly-“

He hoped this would come up later rather than sooner, but it seemed there is no way around it now.

“I died nine years ago in Nibelheim, everything that I may have done afterward, I do not remember.”

Ah, there was that guilt again.

He felt guilt for quite a few different actions – not having stopped Genesis and Angeal sooner, pushing his problems onto Zack and Cloud and newly the burning of Nibelheim – but the fact he had allegedly done something as drastic as the events of Meteorfall and couldn’t remember it, hurt more than it should have.

Nibelheim brought him guilt, due to him still being able to follow his train of thought.

Sephiroth knew that it was irrational, looking back on it, that it made no sense – and that fact made it even worse – but he at least knew what he was thinking – why he had done what he did.

But this?

Calling forth a meteor to wound and then absorb the lifestream seemed so strange.

Why would he do that? Could he even survive that? It apparently had something to do with JENOVA again, was it at fault for it?

Why did he know for certain that he had done that?

He never had that strong of a moral compass as Zack, Angeal or even Genesis had.

He learned what was right and wrong by gauging the reactions of the people around him – If they deemed it right or wrong.

And if he couldn’t remember what he did wrong, how can he prevent it?

Maybe guilt wouldn’t be the right way to describe his feelings, no… He lamented it.

Angeal seemed to know what he was hinting at since he seemed to deflate a bit as well.

“So, it’s true?” Angeal glanced at him.

“As far as I know.”

Angeal deflated a bit. “Is there anything we could do?”

Sephiroth shrugged, he wouldn’t really know.

* * *

_Angeal had been expecting a cadet to come by._

_A cadet he had heard quite a lot about, from Zack and Genesis alike._

_A seventeen-year-old cadet who made the journey from Nibelheim to hear completely alone some time ago._

_He apparently had started his track here while he was still sixteen, just after his mother’s birthday, to come here to become part of SOLDIER, but failed multiple times already due to varying reasons._

_He often got into fights with his peers and seemed to actively train with Zack nowadays._

_Genesis had told him gleefully yesterday that the Cadet was more scared of him than of Genesis himself and that that was hilarious._

_So, Angeal didn’t really know what to think of him._

_When he came stumbling into the garden, fidgeting and tripping over himself, Angeal had to hold back laughter._

_Cloud Strife was his name and he was shorter than Angeal had expected._

_If he were to compare then he would say that he himself, Zack, and even Genesis who had always been teased with being kind of short before their respective jumps in height before becoming a SOLDIER, then Cloud would still fall short, literally._

_But comparing people was not something he should do, much less so with someone he just heard through word of mouth before._

_No matter that the word of mouth was the only reason he had chosen him to do his gardening work while he was away._

_The cadet also had extremely spikey blond hair, which caused him to stick out quite a bit in Midgar._

_Angeal wondered if his was naturally that spikey or if he took just as long to style his hair like Zack did._

_Or did he take even longer?_

_Cloud looked up at him with uncertain yet fierce sky blue eyes. “So, sir, what do you want me to do the next week?”_

_So, Angeal walked him through the steps of taking care of his plants._

_Since nothing grows naturally in Midgar anymore, you had to put extra care into them, then if you wanted to grow them anywhere else._

_They overall never got as big as related fauna in other areas and needed to be trimmed more often as well as given more water._

_Winter was just over, even if you wouldn't notice that in Midgar, not really at least._

_“Uhm, sir, I have a small question.”_

_Did Cloud’s hair feel more like the feathers of a Chocobo, or like a hedgehog's nails?_

_Again, that would depend if it was natural or used a lot of hair gel…_

_How would you even get such naturally spikey hair?_

_“Uhm, sir?” Cloud shook Angeal out of his thoughts._

_“Yes, cadet?”_

_“Why do plants even need to be trimmed?”_

_Well, you see…” He thought for a moment and looked around for an example._

_After a few seconds, he found one and walked to the plant._

_He knelt down and took the damaged branch into his hand._

_The garden was open, on top of one of the roofs of the smaller Shinra buildings – at least smaller when compared to the tower – it wasn’t ideal, but some glass walls protected the plants from the sand at least, but some insects still liked to make their home here and damage the plants in the process._

_Cloud followed him and looked at the branch in his had as well._

_“There are multiple reasons for them to be trimmed, maybe so they don’t get in the way of something, like with trees or because a damaged branch can cause stress for the plant, like with this one here.” He took a scissor into his other hand and cut the branch off and threw the branch into the compost bin he had standing here. “And some plants need to be trimmed after winter, similar to how hair normally works” He used his now free hand to take the opportunity to ruffle the cadet’s hair, just to make his point clear._

_But just for comparison, it was unfairly soft, and not even Sephiroth’s weirdly soft hair could compare to it._

_How could hair this spikey be so soft? How made that sense? And why was it so spikey to begin with?_

_“Just maybe not yours.” And with that, he let out a snicker and took his hand away_

_If sprung right back up, as if his hair never came into its way._

_Cloud looked at him accusingly and exclaimed: “My hair is not that weird.” While trying – and failing – to push his hair down._

_Angeal let out an actual laugh this time. “Never said it was weird, just unusual.”_

_“Isn’t that the same thing?”_

_“Not really, and even if they were, is it a bad thing?_

_Cloud looked at him as if trying to guess if he was serious or not._

_Angeal just sighed and went back to explaining the procedures of taking care of the plants._

_“So, how was meeting Cloud?”_

_Angeal threw a glare in Genesis’s direction. “His hair is way too soft.”_

_That made Genesis stand up shocked. “You got to touch his hair?”_

_“Yeah, don’t think he liked it…”_

_“My friend, your desire_

_Is the bringer of life, the gift of the goddess”_

_“Yeah, yeah.”_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lots of Angeal and angst this chapter.  
> Also, tell me how you found the more emotional bits... I've never done something similar to this before, so I don't know if it turned out well...
> 
> Heh, I had the re-write this chapter at least four times, it just never wanted to turn out well.  
> I am still not really satisfied with this one (Especially the Zack and Sephiroth parts, they didn't really turn out well) but I didn't want to make you wait even longer (is anyone even waiting for this?)  
> So, uhm, sorry about it taking so long, even despite the re-writes, other games like Zelda and Hollow knight also took up some time... and school, school was also a huge factor... so.. sorry, again...

**Author's Note:**

> By the way, this ended up longer than I originally expected.  
> I tried to write each of the segments to suit more to the character it featured... And I had the most fun for the last three segments.
> 
> Now, I hope to get some constructive criticism of this since I hope to improve and that doesn't work that well through pure stubborn writing.  
> 


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